When I was cleaning out my mother’s house I found a painting of my father’s church. I mean, a painting of the church where my father was the minister. He was forced to resign from this church and they divorced four years later, so why in the name of God or… Read full post »

I went to a funeral on Saturday and it was great! I mean, as great as anything that involves a corpse can be. Maybe I get a little bit anthropological about these experiences. I was concerned, due to the Irish Catholic nature of the event, that things might get lugubrious. I… Read full post »

It’s like the tree of life is right outside my window, but stark and altered. Forgive me, but I never liked that book “The Giving Tree”. I never got it – the tree gives everything and ends up a stump because of the boy’s selfishness.

Several weeks ago, the… Read full post »

This is the house that I looked at, with the white picket fence, a farmhouse from 1880 shouldering up next to an apartment building built in the 1930’s. Is it true that home ownership is a right, or that it makes you a better citizen?

I… Read full post »

I have a funny feeling that lying on the couch and watching costume dramas is not making me rich or British. I’m now well versed in how these things occur – Cornwall is sunny with cliffs, Yorkshire is subject to weather but full of kind hearted folk, with an occasional meanie.… Read full post »

Most of my best friends are thieves, of one sort or another. Most of my best friends are also the kindest and most generous people you could ever meet. I’m a thief, and consider myself kind and generous.

I wonder if it comes down to morality. I think we decided… Read full post »

I'm not sure if I have quit many jobs. I've certainly been fired, but that's a different issue. Is wandering away from a place of employ - forever - the same as quitting? Does not showing up, ever again, count?

            Quitting sounds romant/… Read full post »

(This is all true, and will probably be a good way for my dear friends and readers here to say: “Oh my, she’s even stranger than I thought.” Back slowly away from this blog and send an occasional comment or PM , but secretly feel scared of me. I understand.)… Read full post »

Alzheimer's: A Caregiver's Story

 It’s not even a year, and yet I come back to talk about Milton. Everything is gone. He can’t walk, he can’t even open his eyes. He is everything he feared.

It’s strange to know him because he HAS had some moments of knowing people. I… Read full post »

In the hopital, after she died, the social worker came and asked permission to make imprints of her hand, for the grandchildren. She also clipped locks of hair and tied them with tiny ribbons. It's a strange craft, that.

I must have looked really out of it because she kindly asked if… Read full post »

I am at my Mother's house again. Because we have not found a will we are seeing a lawyer tomorrow and entering into probate. Sucky sucky fuck fuck.

She's just around the corner, in the dining room, in her urn. Should I yell at her?

I think there are seven… Read full post »

I brought my Mother home today, in her beautiful handcrafted urn. ( A combination of subtle brown wood tones).The guy at the funeral home asked: "How are you?" and I said,"I'm pretty good!" to which he replied "No you're not." What???Hand over my Mother and let me flee your department store… Read full post »

My mother is dying. Yesterday, she was fine. She was diagnosed with a condition called "pre leukemia", which is also known as myelodysplastic syndrome, last March. But the prognosis seemed good - she was a healthy 75 year old woman,taking great care of herself and working through volunteering.

S… Read full post »

I have had three abortions. For some reason, I seem to run the gamut from "not ready for a baby" to "raped" to "ectopic pregnancy - dangerous." Not in that order. But as I keep reading these posts on abortion - so many of which have been illuminating while heartbreaking- I realized… Read full post »

This post is about my experiences of the past year and a half with one man and his family. Thanks for reading.

I met Milt and his daughter in September of 2007. They had advertised for a companion/PCA, I answered the ad, and it was just one of those things. They had already… Read full post »