At times like this, she comes to me,
the woman I could have been.
Somehow I know her only big question
would be about loneliness.
While I have so many,
like belongings in a cheap, messy bag
I know she wouldn’t have,
like longish hairs on a crumpled pillowcase
(her hair would always be smoothed and pulled back).
_______________________________________________
I woke up this morning to two work situations that make me know more than ever that I need to make some different choices. And when faced with those choices, I wished I'd made them long ago - and some others. I often see this other me, and she seems like she's got so much figured out, so much more room to breathe, even though I know I'm very lucky for what I have.
I haven't wanted to post anything until the situation with Hermes the cat got resolved. But unfortunately, that situation hasn't been resolved, either. So I'm going to post about him here again, in the hopes that maybe his photo and description will find the right reader this time - someone who wants to, and can, take him into their life, or someone who could spread the word to the right person. My sincere thanks and immense gratitude go out to those of you who've already helped in so many ways.
My brother and I are desperately trying to find a new home for his cat Hermes, who he can't take with him when he moves.


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There's only so much you can do for Hermes. Although, there are lots of things you can do for yourself.
I hope both of you find the peace and serenity you deserve.
Good luck with Hermes. Things work out in surprising ways most times.
I was that decisive "man I could have been" until I was about 43 YO. Things changed and life is different now, I don't think I was happier then.
Hermes - You continue to do what you can do. That is all it is fair to ask of yourself. No one, no matter how decisive and high-achieving, can guarantee success in all life's adventures. That is for the gods, not us.
However things end up, you will have done your best.
And, btw, your poem is intriguing. You capture perfectly the duality of the real us v. the ideal us.
Gerald, thank you so much for having asked your local pet shop owner about Hermes - whatever the outcome, I hope you know how much I appreciate it.
Thanks to all of you for your encouragement and kindness and insights. If you can, please spread the word about Hermes.
Thanks again to you all!
Lezlie
You may wish to reword the 'ad' to something more ++ in his favor as well. You have the one Bell sent ~ I'd adopt *that* cat. Flaws are best dressed in nice outfits with happy hats and a smile. I'll repost in my area as well today. Sending a ((hug)) to you today.
I'm so sorry you haven't found the right home for beautiful Hermes yet! I do wish I could just say "we'll take him" but I think Alice would be traumatized if we brought in anything other than a female kitten of her own breed (for which we are still searching; it would be easy if we wanted to go to a breeder but we are determined to honor the memory of rescued Trixie by making the next member of our feline family a rescue kitten, too.)
SIGH. Blessings and hopes for all humans and felines who are searching...
Sorry about Hermes, I hope he finds someone.
Lezlie – Thank you so much for offering to spread the word about Hermes. My brother lives in Atlanta, but will be moving to the Metro New York area. It would be easier for him – and easier on Hermes – if they could find him a home in the Atlanta area. Again, thank you so much for spreading the word.
cheshyre – Thank you for this very insightful quote from my favorite artist, to boot!
nilesite – Thank you. I hope things will work out for Hermes, too. Thanks to the help of friends – including OS friends – we do have some hope.
Abby – Thank you – and rest assured, that wonderful text you speak of is currently featured in several ads we and others have posted on various internet sites and forums. Since I’d written at length about Hermes and his situation here, I decided to go for the informative paragraph – but I am thinking that if things don’t change, Hermes might just get a special photo spread with those fantastic words – attributed to their writer, of course!
Eva – First of all, thank you for your kind words about my work situation. I hope things will change for the better, too. And that things will get better for you, as well. Secondly, no worries at all about your not taking in Hermes – I completely understand that he wouldn’t be a good fit! I admire so much that you guys are choosing to adopt a shelter cat. I would say, though, why do you think the cat must be the same breed as Alice? I understand if you don’t want, say, a large breed cat or one with long hair, but if it’s a short hair, you don’t think it would be okay? Whatever you guys decide, I wish you luck, and, as I wrote in a comment on your latest post, I think it’s wonderful that when you go to this upcoming cat adoption event, even if you don’t find the right cat, you will make a donation to a shelter. Bravo!
Trudge – You are, and continue to be, so awesome. Thank you so much for your support!
caroline – I don’t know if that woman we should have/could have been not coming anymore, is a good thing, or not. Thank you for making me think about that….And thanks for your good wishes for Hermes.
Abby – I was wondering about that, too. I’m curious to know what Eva thinks about this, why she has come to this conclusion. As I wrote above, I can understand maybe not wanting to get a cat from a breed that’s drastically different in size or appearance, since her cat Trixie was Alice’s sister, and they’re the only cats each knew. But I don’t know, if the cat is moderate-sized short hair of pretty much any breed, I’m not sure there would be much of a difference. I hope Eva will write about this – either as a response here, or maybe on her own blog. But most of all, I hope she, Lady Lucia, and Alice, find a new cat to add to their family and to love and be loved by.
yes you are and yet but you got a goddamn cat to worry about.
as for this chick you mention,
"the woman I could have been.
Somehow I know her only big question
would be about loneliness.
While I have so many," etc.
lonely is the answer and the curse. what the hell would you do without your preference for solitude?
you are projecting on this cat. it is, alyssa, just a cat. you are a soul
James - It's great to see you here! Thanks for your kind words - though I have to say, I believe the cat is also a soul, that we're worth the same. That's not an opinion everyone has, but it's why I can't stop thinking about him and hoping with all my heart that things will turn out okay.