After three consecutive days of grueling sessions with my trainer, I am happy to spend today away from the gym. I'll still be working out, but the fact that I won't have to drive in order to sweat makes me feel like I'm on vacation. I've been going to the gym now for a month and, to my disappointment, I still hate it. I hope that this changes!

My weight has seen minimal change (only four pound loss) and my clothes do not fit differently, except of course for my bra which is the only part of me I'm not trying to shrink. I keep thinking that I'm going to feel stronger. Unfortunately, all I'm feeling is extremely sore. We're currently on our fourth tube of Bengay. It is hard to remain motivated when I'm not seeing or feeling any results.

My pinch cut sores are beginning to heal, and I'm hopeful that they will be completely closed before my training session next Tuesday. After my post detailing the painful situation, I was contacted by some amputee athletes. I was advised to try something called body glide. Apparently this gel is designed to minimize friction and to reduce the likelihood of pinch cuts and sores. I ordered it immediately and I am looking forward to giving it a try.

The athletes seemed surprised that I have never heard of this exercise-specific lotion. I get so frustrated when I confront and struggle with an issue only to discover that a simple remedy is readily available making my suffering unnecessary. I'm active in the amputee community and try to stay current on the newest advances. Still, this exercise lotion eluded me. It makes me wonder, what else don't I know about?

I hate that, despite the access to instant knowledge on the Internet and my ability to network, I feel like I am still blindly trying things, hoping to stumble upon something that works. There is so little written about amputee fitness, especially in regard to issues such as inappropriate exercises, sores and pinch cuts, and limb cramping. I know I cannot be the only person to have encountered these issues.

While I'm disappointed in the results of my training and I'm frustrated with my fitness "experts," I have learned a lot during the past few weeks. I'm going to keep speaking up and advocating for appropriate exercises with my trainer. I'm also going to keep researching and trying to learn how to maintain a healthy limb under this strain. I am beginning to lose hope that my body will be transformed, but I am certainly learning bundles through this experience.