β€œIn life we all have an unspeakable secret"

Ande Bliss

Ande Bliss
November 04
Essays, poetry, opinion and short stories. Free lance on line and in print. Favorite quote: "In life we all have an unspeakable secret, and irreversible regret, an unreachable dream, and an unforgettable love.” ― Diego Marchi Personal Website:


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DECEMBER 15, 2012 3:08PM


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Thoughts are with grieving families. Now bereft.

When my own daughter was diagnosed with terminal colon cancer she was 30.
She couldn't wrap her head around the idea.  Neither could we. How could it happen?
There were no warning signs.

One day she was planning to build a new home. The next week she was writing her will.

"Do you mean I won't ever have children? Or live to be an old woman?" she asked me?

How does one answer that? I think I just looked at her and cried. Sometimes I try to imagine her...older.
Deedee's death was agonizing. I wanted to steal her. To put her back inside of me and run. But at least I got to say goodbye...I got to be with her in her final minutes. I got to tell her that I loved her.

Not so for the parents of the children at Sandy Hook Elementary School in Newtown, Connecticut. They will have to spend a life time wondering if they told their children that they loved them enough. And they will always remember their children going off to school and exactly what they wore on thatday. The last time they saw them. The day they died.

In the very old days, when a  Jewish child was sick the Orthodox would name or rename the baby Alter. It meant old.

So when the supposed angel of death came to find he child...he would instead find a old person.

Yesterday the angel of death came to Newtown. He came to wreak havoc. He came for children. And he found them.

And so little lives were stopped in pools of blood. Little screams silenced. 

Families were ruined. Dreams were destroyed. And the WHY was on everyone's lips.

The grey mist of mourning spread throughout the land. Flags were lowered. Pundits preached. The President cried. And the rest of us watched in disbelief.

And what about the survivors? Indeed, they will jump and hide every time a car back fires. They will have post traumatic stress syndrome for the rest of their lives. They will never feel safe. And why should they? Mad men are everywhere. And we cannot stop them from their evil destiny.

On December 14th the Devil danced.

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The first step in solving the problem is naming it. The problem is not crazy people, or media, or (just) the NRA. The problem is that assalt weapons and ammunition made for killing masses of people by persons of no skill or discrimination are available period. It takes only a few minutes of insanity to destroy 28 lives, or a hundred lives, or a million lives. It depends on your weapon of mass distruction.
Yes. Madmen ARE everywhere. Those few who are mad by nature and the many, many who are made that way by the conditioning of a mad society.

Who in their right mind would ever have deliberately created a society where each preys on all others. Who designed a society where the strong make virtual slaves of the not-strong while encouraging - nay while demanding - that the not-strong imitate the strong and 'honour' them as 'the best of the best"?

People acknowledge the madness but won't even "go there" if you mention the reasons for most of it. We'd never expect to put a weak, but usually healthy, person into a room full of sick people, and have them remain healthy. Yet we expect those, not mentally or emotionally strong, to remain healthy in a society that is clearly of a sociopathic nature. As well ask a tree not to burn in a forest fire.
Andre, beautiful column but hard to believe the mass of deaths makes your loss any easier. You are one classy lady.