By ANDREA HIGBIE
It seems that Jill Zarin has more to worry about than getting a hobby or fending off Ramona Singer's alcoholism stingers.
Just when Jill teeters on the verge of becoming memorable for something other than her jillousy on "The Real Housewives of New York," Michael Lohan is giving her a run for her catchphrase.
"I'm gonna have a hawt attack!" Lindsay's father croaked on "Celebrity Rehab" Sunday.
No!!! That's Jill's heart attack! And that's her catchphrase!
"I'm gonna have a hawt attack!" Jill threatened, her back to the cameras and, more important, to Ramona, as she stumbled out of the Singer Suite in Morocco in June.
The women had had yet another of their vicious fights, supposedly -- as always -- to once and for all clear the air. Never works.
Since the promised heart attack never attacked, not in Morocco nor back in New York, Jill's fellow fame-whoring drama queen Michael Lohan, simmering away on "Celebrity Rehab" in Pasadena, no doubt felt he was permitted -- required! -- to use the line.
After all, what better way to get attention? And just about everything else has been tried.
Michael Lohan's histrionics had slightly more substance than Jill Zarin's, since, according to Dr. Drew, and he wears the stethoscope, Lohan has a heart condition, one that neither cocaine nor ill-advised love affairs can cure.
And if you were dealing with his ex-fiancee, Kate Major, who happens to be Jon Gosselin's as well, then you'd have a fair idea of what was going on in fibrillation-related matters at the Pasadena treatment center/staging area.
Especially since Lohan thinks that Major should check herself in to rehab, though not with him. Though that's among his sanest thoughts since thrusting himself upon the public, it's not flawless.
Dr. Drew and staff contend that Michael Lohan needs help (yep) and that his focus should be on his recovery and on his family. (Hello, Lindsay!) Not on the raving lunatics drawn to him, and he to them, like psychomagnets.
Though supposedly just an oy vey away from a heart attack, Jill Zarin and Michael Lohan seem safe enough, for the time being.
And, anyway, to have a heart attack, you need to have a heart.