So today represents my one year anniversary of being on the wagon. 

Last night I went out in West Hollywood with some friends. It was the same event as last year, the same crazy costumes.  There were significant differences though.  I was with people I trusted this year, who wouldn't let anything bad happen to me, nor I to them.  I was sober, so no creepy lurker was able to lure me into a vehicle.  I went out, frolicked, and had a blast with my friends.  Then I came home, took a shower, and went to bed. 

I got up early, went over lines for an audition for a class, went to it, and bombed.  Horribly.  I started crying like an idiot.  The teacher actually said maybe I should do something else with my life.  LOL.  As if I have a choice.  If you are an artist of any kind, you know what I  mean.  It's in my blood.  I have tried to distract myself, to distance myself, but this is where I always come back to.  This is who I am.  I am going to hold tightly to that no matter what anyone says.

I have learned so much from this past year about what I want from life, but more importantly who I want to be.  I am not perfect.  Far from it.  And that's okay.  I am trying to be a happy, healthy, good human being, and do what I love.  Every day.  That's all I can do, and I know in my heart that is enough.  I have made giant leaps in that direction. I have so many things to be grateful for, but MOST of all the incredible outpouring of love and support I have gotten from old friends, new friends, and blog friends.  I could never have made it all the way without the love and support you guys gave me.  God dammit, now I'm crying again.  I don't know why I am so sensitive today. 

You guys would have died laughing if you saw what just happened.  I was a HOT MESS.  I think I am just so emotional about being a year sober, dealing with my life changing in so many different ways, and just being a lady, that I couldn't physically stop the tears.  I was trying with all my might, but I couldn't stop.  Afterwards one of the girls came up to me and told me I was a blond bombshell and not to worry about it, which was so sweet, and I cried.  Again. 

Clearly it is an emotional day for me, for obvious reasons, and was maybe not the best time to audition for a new acting class, but who knows.  Maybe someday I'll tell this story on the Tonight Show......

Again, thank you all for everything you've done for me along this journey.  I am a very lucky person and  even if nothing else ever came out of this year, you alone would have made it worth it.  Lots of love to you all.

Thanks for reading. :)