It has occurred to me that, in the paraphrased words of Gertrude Stein “there is no there here.” I am a mirror, something that exists only for the purpose of reflecting an image for anyone looking in from the outside. I am a chameleon; I can be anything… Read full post »

Iron Maiden, "Purgatory" 

I have been slogging through hip-deep mud, grateful for something so small as the sight of a sleeping baby in a shopping cart, or… Read full post »

A lifetime ago, when I lived in Boston, the object of my affection purchased a sleek, black Volkswagen Jetta. He was leading a grownup life that involved having a job, and so he could afford things like cars and restaurant meals. We rode all over New England in that car, and… Read full post »

“What’s broken can always be fixed…what’s fixed will always be broken…”.

Jens Lekman, “Your Arms Around Me”

At the end of the day, I survey the damage. On the top of my left hand is a small, red gouge, one quarter of the way to… Read full post »

“In these poems, written in the last months of her life, and often rushed out at the rate of two or three a day, Sylvia Plath becomes herself, becomes something imaginary, newly, wildly and subtly created.”

-Robert Lowell, Introduction to Ariel: Poems by Sylvia Plath

“For… Read full post »

I am meant to be asleep. I could not see the stairs as I descended, but the cats could. They ran before me, sure-footed in the darkness, anticipating some unusual midnight lark involving milk or an extra trip outside. They are delighted, bright-eyed and anticipating only good. They love me, in… Read full post »

“Happiness or sorrow -
Whatever befalls you, Walk on
Untouched, unattached. “

-Buddha

I have always been a fan of stoicism and restraint. I am drawn to suf… Read full post »

It's always there, the black ice. Not the kind that lies beneath the pretty illusion of a fresh, white snowfall, but the kind seen from below, the kind that grows above the unwitting swimmer and traps her beneath its unyielding, opaque weight. I swim for months, in this case for years… Read full post »

We are walking out of the restaurant into the dark, arctic chill of a Michigan night. My parents, each holding a cane in one hand, join hands to support each other as they step up onto the curb, cross the sidewalk island separating restaurant from parking lot, and then step off… Read full post »

In conversation yesterday, a co-worker said that she has been shy as a child, but wasn’t any more. This interested me a) because I am nosy and like to know everything about everybody, and b) because I have lifelong dual citizenship in the realm of shy v. not shy. I have… Read full post »

“When Ugg-shuffling ends, can flip flop slapping be far behind?”

-Ann Nichols, Facebook, February 28, 2011

Yesterday, my husband caught me with my eyes half shut and a faint smile playing across my lips. I think, possibly, that I was actually purring. &ldquo… Read full post »

Three weeks ago, the dogs got out again. Pulling into the driveway, looking forward to my couch and “Modern Family,” I noticed that the back door was wide open. I live in an old house, and things tend to fall apart; it wasn’t the condition of the house but the implications… Read full post »

Although I grew up in Michigan, I was not one of those people who went Up North at every opportunity; I spent my summers in Maine or in Europe, and never crossed the Mackinac Bridge to the Upper Peninsula until I was 30. I knew about pasties, though,… Read full post »

“Most folks are about as happy as they make up their minds to be.”

Abraham Lincoln

While my admiration of Lincoln as a President and a human being is abundant and sincere, I have hated this quote since the first time I read it. It often appears in the… Read full post »

Of course I bought an iPhone. I have been waiting forever, from the time the rumors began to swirl about an Apple/Verizon partnership. For years I have carried both an iPod and a cell phone which is not exactly apocalyptic, but also not exactly convenient. There is only one dedicated spot… Read full post »

I think I have a really good sense of humor. I appreciate snark, subtlety and sarcasm, and many of my favorite funny things walk a fine line between humor and blasphemy of various kinds. I love “Family Guy,” “The Simpsons,” Sarah Silverman, “Mr. Show,” “Dogma… Read full post »

American Idol is, for me, a matter of some complexity. It is a “good news/bad news” story.  You know, “the bad news is that I fell off the rafters in the barn, but the good news is that I fell into the hay, but the bad news is that there was… Read full post »

A few days ago I received a message from an old friend, in which he called me a “Facebook Slut.” He was joking, and he was right. He was responding, specifically, to this status update: “What is the question, the answer to which is ‘yes?’”  This status shared… Read full post »

Today, as is so often the case in this part of my life, I will be sitting in a waiting room at the hospital with one of my parents while the other has something done. Today, mom is having a cardiac catheterization - not usually life-threatening, but in her case it… Read full post »

Last week was brutal in ways best kept in my private mental warehouse. Suffice it to say that by the end of it, by the time I was in a ball on my couch with a Vicodin melting my endless headache, I wanted to be made happier. I didn’t want to… Read full post »

This morning I was pretty mellow at school drop-off time. The Cloud of Jankdom seems to have lifted, at least momentarily, and I was feeling a little hopeful, a little energetic, like maybe I could make something of this day. My son, who sat beside me blasting Eminem at a decibel… Read full post »