er uh something like that.......

Last night I went to bed early - it was like delayed NyQuil reaction. NyQuil usually produces some kick ass nightmares, and some pretty scary ones, too. Anyway, obviously it was night time and I was driving but my car's noises started to get louder and I knew I needed to get off the road quick.

Up ahead I saw a school bus pull into the parking lot of a Shell station and open the side door and out came a bunch of Mother Goose looking, little, old ladies, bent and white haired - all wearing sweater jackets of varying colors.

I pulled into the Shell station as well. I needed some oil or gas or something. When I got out of the car I saw the old ladies were carrying these little signs that consisted of an 8X8" piece if paper glued to a popsicle stick, with the words "Keep Out" written on them in such light colored, green pastel marker you could barely read it, even close up.

One lady approached me as I started to enter the store.

"Do you come here regularly?"

"No, actually I don't live around here. I was just in town to visit my parents and ....

"Well, I do! And I get so lonely, too."

"oh, I'm sorry to hear that. If I lived nearby we'd have to do lunch or something one day......"

Back at my parents old house, I was in the kitchen with my sister, scoping out the fridge for a midnight smackerel of something. We were talking quietly in the full on darkness when suddenly we saw a flash of light through the wooden blinds my dad had installed over the glass of the kitchen door window. Then we heard the sound of a drill.

I raised the slats of the blind ever so slightly to see what the hell was going on and there was a real old car backed into our driveway. The kind of car that is like a tank and has the tail lights that go all the way across the rear of the car in one piece.

"Looks like somebody broke down and ducked in our driveway for the use of the electricity. No one has been here for so long let's not let them know we are here now. Keep the lights off until they have gone."

There was an easy chair in the kitchen with linens draped over it and a bed that was a bit messed up with sheets askew. A lady cop came around to the back door as if we had called her and was expecting her arrival. I played along because it sure can't hurt to have a cop handy with a couple of nefarious characters in the driveway in the middle of the night.

Lady cop took a seat on the corner/foot of the bed making small talk.

"Has there been a lot of crime in this area as of late?" I asked her.

"Yes, and it's about to get worse," She said jerking her head towards the kitchen door.

"What do you mean?" I asked.

She was moving her head and hands in a harsh jerking fashion as if what she was now mouthing was extremely important and maybe dangerous. I was trying to figure out what she was saying but it was so dark I could not read her lips. That is when I noticed a silhouette darker than the dark sitting in the sheet covered easy chair.

I jumped up and grabbed a gun that was lying on the night table. Someone switched on a lamp and I could see him. He crossed the room from the chair to the bed and parked himself on his knees behind Lady cop, laughing. Laughing because the gun I had grabbed was a toy.

Lady cop said, "yeah, don't do that.

Our perp looked like some version of Kid Rock with blond greasy hair and a dirty look about him, though he was wearing a beige and brown Bill Cosby/ Phil Huckstable style sweater.

"Ok, toss me your gun, then," I said.

Lady cop tossed me her gun and I caught it, cocked it and thought for a short second, "He'll just do it again. If I let him go, he will just break into someone else's house, rape or kill someone else." I instantly knew he had killed more than one woman and that was his sole intention on this night, as well. So I pulled the trigger and shot him in the chest.

The look of surprise on his face told me he didn't think I would do it. He could not make a sound and he fell face forward on the bed, struggling to breathe, to hold on to the sacred life that he so viciously took from his victims and had intended to take from me, my sister or Lady cop.

Lady cop was stunned and kept taking his pulse to check for death which took a minute. When she was satisfied he was dead she called 911.

I felt kind of fucked up for what I did but I knew it had to be done or something worse would happen. He would have taken an innocent life, I could see it like a vision in my head. I got in the shower as we waited for the ambulance.

Lady cop knocked on the door and I came out of the shower and opened the door. She said, "They're here, whenever you're ready........ you might want to put something on first, though."

"Oh. Yeah." I closed the door and reached for my bathrobe....

Then SavageHusband woke me up, telling the kids to go to bed....
 

But what does it mean?

The Bus and the Elderly ladies represent 2 things of great dread to me. 1- the crotchety old women on ebay (not all but the one's I do encounter) and 2-School starting back in a few days which strikes such fear into my gut that just saying it makes me want to throw up.

Shell Station & my messed up car - Shell represents big business and employment - my car in their parking lot means I have to go back to corporate America to fix my problems

The signs - small signs with keep out written in pastel (light) green. Being picketed in front of Shell - stay away from low paying ("light on the green") jobs that sound great but are really going nowhere.

My parent's old house (the past? I need to go backwards somewhere in my life - there is something there that needs attention if I want to move forward)

"Kid Rock" in a Phil Huckstable sweater - the above mentioned thing is a bad thing that seemed good (a wolf in sheep's clothing)

Toy gun - protect my kids

Shooting "Kid Rock" - Assassinate your enemies (not literally - but get rid of the bad guys in my life) but make sure to have someone with clout to have your back (Lady cop).