I am amazed at the number of internet posts that - in the face of the terrible tragedy in Aurora - want to focus ire on a mother who brought her 3 month old baby to the movie. That baby was injured, but thankfully, was not killed. But given the amount of angst over the harm that was done to this baby by its mother daring to expose it to violence, you would think that the gunman sought the hapless mother out and shot the baby point-blank. Is that what you all secretly think she deserved? 

Cut this poor girl some slack! Lets looks at the evidence. She was at the very first showing of a superhero movie, obviously a fan of comics and sci-fi. Only the hard-core fans show up at the sacred first showing of a sci-fi movie. So obviously she was a geek and likely very young. And likely this was her first baby. And likely she is young enough to be fine with the environment  of loud noise and high stimulation. So maybe you don't agree with that being appropriate for the baby - are you her mother or mother-in-law? Well, she's probably ignoring them too. So what's new?

This is her world and her life and that's what the baby will know as it grows up. Was your young motherhood so much better? Did you make no mistakes? Were your kids always protected and followed every rule? Did they grow up perfect in every way? Probably not. Likely some of your kids blame you for some failing in your mothering and you likely harbor some guilt and always will. Lets not throw stones in those pretty glass houses. And you can't look at environment or choices that make a good mother - a pierced and tatted punk mother may bring up a gloriously well-balanced child in the midst of chaos while a cautious, protective mother could bring up... well, a mass murderer. I don't see a word on the Internets about the shooter's mother, she's getting lots of consideration. Why focus on this one girl to the exclusion of the many, many issues around this event. 

And speaking of guilt, think of this poor girl, almost losing her baby through NO FAULT OF HER OWN. If the shooter hadn't shown up at the theater, the worst she would have been guilty of would be annoying her fellow geeks, and no one else would have said a word about it. But now she will have the whole world in her face and she will blame herself and suffer for the rest of her life over this twist of fate. To have chattering masses pile on to this victim - yes, she is a victim! - and blame her is just crass and unfeeling. Don't think for a minute that your criticism is limited to your own little blog or Facebook post - you know she is already getting  vicious emails and FB comments of exactly the same kind, from other self-righteous mothers who need to focus their fear on something they can wrap their brain around. 

Because that's what your criticism looks like to this bystander - a mother's terror that  there for the grace of god... And you can't process the fear, the grief, the loss that that event would cause in your life if you were her. But please, it's important to express those emotions, for you and for her. If you can focus on anything during the coverage of this tragedy, focus on sending love, support, and most importantly, exoneration to this young woman.  She so needs that right now.