He started out in 2nd grade ordering a big bully to follow me home from school and beat me up. Then after I made him laugh, he helped me get elected as elementary school class president. We became best friends throughout junior high up to the 2nd year of high school until my family and I moved away. I returned a couple years later to him a changed friend. He became sexually active and was screwing everything in sight. He had an aggravation to him...a hoodish coolness that was brassy, cutting, and tough. He was in a punk band. No longer did we play REM songs together.
There once was love...and a radiating glow. But now there is only alcohol, and self serving depravity. Drink, fuck, play frisbee golf, and sing Karaoke.
Tonight he rushed over to my car window and told me to "get the fuck out of here, that nobody wants me here". I was startled, not knowing if he was serious or kidding. He wasn't kidding...only he was. That was his method: Effective.
He had wanted me to take him to sing karaoke as another guy stiffed him on their plans for 8 o'clock. I was there when the plans were being made, but I announced ahead of time that I probably wouldn't make it. Karaoke wasn't my thing, and I didn't have the money to spend on drinks. I'm serious about my small business I'm starting, and priorities don't allow me to have such nights out.
The sheer causticness of his tone, sent me to a bad place. I'm not used to getting spoken to in that way. I'm an adult now.
He used to be my friend for a few years in between the hoodiness... but the hoodiness has returned, and I'm going to have to check out on our relationship for another fifteen years.
Goodbye Scott. I'm not sure it's been nice knowing you.


Salon.com
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