About a year ago, after two different attempts at college, and several failed jobs, we arranged for our son to reside in a private group home.  The place wasn't licensed by anyone - it was just one of several homes run by a gentleman with the calling of helping troubled individuals.  Most of the residents of my son's home were SSI types.  Some of the individuals were troubled veterans, paranoid szchizophrenics, bi-polar disorder sufferers, and even an young adult living with the effects of fetal alcohol syndrome.   Interestingly, the residents ranged in age from 18 to 70, making for a very diverse and motley crew. My son had to share a room with a number of different individuals over the course of his residency, only one giving him cause for concern.  He was the one who attacked the television with a knife before being sent back to the psychiatric ward.  This was obviously a cause for concern, as the operator relayed to us that only stablized individuals resided in this particular home.

     The home was spartan and located in a transitional neighborhood.  The refrigerator sported a lock to protect the menu items from being gobbled by the various tenants craving food as a result of their medication.  The home's operator demanded cleanliness and curfews, as well as participation in some type of gainful actvity during the day:  day program, library, day work, etc.

     Our goal was for our son to have a place away from our home where he could be independent, but not vulnerable.  His last attempt at joint tenancy left him physically abused and his possessions lost.  In essence, he returned to us with what I almost likened to a case of traumatic stress syndrome.  It took several months for him to stablize. 

     At the time, we felt this group home a viable alternative for him because things were not going well in our home -- and for sanity's sake, we all needed a break from one another.  The instability was so bad last Summer, that we had to send our daughter off to college early for her Freshman year. 

    Once my son stablized and realized on his own that medication was necessary for his well-being, he was allowed to return home.  The agreement was that he must be on his medication and he must be employed.  Thus far, the meds are a little hit and miss but I remind him daily.  He did finally find full-time employment.

     Although factory stock room work is not the most interesting for a brilliant aspergers bi-polar man-boy, he has adjusted well and has been on the job for four months now.  He has saved enough money to buy a new lap top computer, and to cover school expenses for the upcoming semester.  He still struggles socially, but has found a social club he enjoys attending and a few eccentric friends which meet his needs.  Most importantly, there is peace in our home.  He suffers from very few outbursts, and is actually quite easy to live with.  I would prefer some changes to his personal hygiene and upkeep, but one thing at a time.

     Our youngest daughter came home for the Summer after 11 months away at college, and so far we have had only one altercation.  The two of them are actually working very hard to get along.  This, a huge turn-around from last Summer where they were going to kill one another -- leading the one to head off to college early. 

     For the time being, all is calm in our household.  It is too good to be true, and as family members of mental health victims know, it is just a matter of time until the next eruption , crisis, or catastrophe arises.  Until then, we are savoring the peace and hanging on yet another day to see where the journey will take us...