Asta Charles

Asta Charles
Los Angeles, California, USA
December 12
Myth Maker
A foul-mouthed commentator on life, society, politics, pop culture, and economics. I spend a lot of time in bars. I wrote a manuscript about the perils of online dating and its ultimate cost to society. It's not published. Meh.


SEPTEMBER 20, 2010 11:38PM

Do I Really Want to be a Lawyer?

The truck reads, At the moment, I'm going through the doldrums of what I'll classify as career PMS. I'm perpetually unhappy with a variety of things about my work, though my notion of unhappiness could change with the way the fucking ocean happens to bring in algae (or not) that day. I'm… Read full post »

Dear Dove World Outreach Center,

First, your name is a fucking abomination. 

Secondly, I'd like to be the first to congratulate you on your future cultural Darwin Award, as well as your commitment to creating a self-fulfilling prophecy. It's just lovely and we all can't wait to find out who dies… Read full post »

SEPTEMBER 3, 2010 3:21AM

Wait, You're in the NFL Now?

raidersSomething I've always truly, deeply treasured - like the love of my freakin' parents - is giving credit where credit is due. This can be a pat on the back, a "hey good going buddy", or even a 3rd grade style gold star.

 Anything. Just a little properly attributed… Read full post »

AUGUST 31, 2010 12:58AM

Los Angeles: I Quit

335127805v2_225x225_FrontAnd it is with a heavy heart that I must turn in my resignation from my post as miserable resident of Los Angeles.

 Wait, no. 

SFX:  Record scratch.

 No, that's not right. I haven't a heavy heart at all, it's quite light in fact. Light like whipped cream on an… Read full post »

AUGUST 29, 2010 3:24PM

I'm drafting a semi-fictional novel

As those of you who still read my blog will attest to, I haven't been writing as much as I used to. I need more fuel for my fire, dammit. So I am going to give myself a challenge and work on something I have not been previously successful with: a… Read full post »

AUGUST 27, 2010 1:47AM

Shame Not, ye Double Dippers

02272010_double-dippingAP has published much hate all up in the grill of the "Double Dippers" lately. This isn't a germophobic piece about those who party hard, dip a chip in some flavored lard, take a bite, then go back for more lard-love. No sir. AP is talking about economists and analysts, like… Read full post »

AUGUST 15, 2010 3:11PM

Scott Pilgrim and the Real World

2007_11_13ScottPHear ye, hear ye, all twenty-something year-old men who refuse to believe that they are jerks, but have actually been jerking around women for the majority of their adolescent and adult existence: you aren't half the man Scott Pilgrim is.

I surely wish girls weren't wandering around fantasizi… Read full post »

robin460Bill and Melinda Gates have made the most of their relative retirement by launching the Gates Foundation. Their mission is to help the neediest of needy with what most shapes their world: health and education. They've also famously allocated a mere $10 million per head inheritance to each of… Read full post »

bruce-springsteenCountry music has morphed with time. It has been shape shifted and molded by industry leaders, demographic demand, political influence, and to some extent - artists themselves (though given the experiennce of other genres, the latter is unlikely). Gone are the days of progressive country music… Read full post »

JULY 26, 2010 2:31AM

Office Jobs Really Are Killing Us

Image from The Examiner blog.Working in an office has its obvious upside: it's generally the case it leads to health insurance, a higher wage, and  a stable wage. Oh and there's air conditioning. Most of us sit on our asses in college for four years (often more) to get to such a luxurious strap-down.… Read full post »

JULY 22, 2010 1:37AM

No Commenting Allowed

Consider this my open-to-all-statement:

I haven't been able to comment all week, but I greatly appreciate those who have come by my blog to pay their respects to my crass rants. 

Though I haven't spent too much time on the interwebs trying to figure out exactly what this oopsy-daisy is all… Read full post »

pt-anderson2In 2008, Paul Thomas (also known by the kid in H-Wood as PT Anderson) was nominated for three Oscars for There Will Be Blood. This post isn't about this movie, but I could easily drown myself (and consequently your eyeballs) in my love and adoration for this film. This film… Read full post »

JULY 15, 2010 1:21AM

The Week We Feared Lesbians

Shiloh is freaking adorable.The gay man has been unfortunately been assigned a poster child. The man in flourescent pink short shorts walking down Santa Monica Boulevard, swinging his hips like he's samba-ing by his lonesome? Yeah, that's him. And the movie Bruno was one big joke about how he doesn't really exist, but… Read full post »

fox_news_idiocracyLike the constant hum of vuvuzelas, which sound like bees without the fear of a sting, our weekly world and US news has become so consistent with the same flavor of strife that it's been, well - boring as all hell.

It's almost as bad as it can be and,… Read full post »

999AMB_Annette_Bening_024On Wednesday the stock market unloaded its bowels at the fact that in May,  new home sales dropped 33% from April.To be fair, April had a huge uptick due to expiration of the home buyer tax credit. So if we throw out that outlier, this decline is probably more like… Read full post »


I realize the intense obscurity and irony of this statement. Glenn Beck, as most of us in this liberal blogosphere would believe, is an over-hyped entertainer crusading as a conservative political and economic evalgenist. He know his audience will believe anything he says. Because like Rush L… Read full post »

john_maynard_keynesOn Friday, I had a economic advancement conversation with dear old dad which ended the same way many of our conversations do. With me professing my liberalism and him professing his love for Ronald Reagan (sort of). 

"Eh well, the economy's gonna tank next year, so we're gonna put all… Read full post »

JUNE 13, 2010 3:58AM

A Prayer to my Birth Control Pills

One might meekly and obviously think that a prayer to birth control pills should be something like:

"May you always keep me infertile in a time of financial despair."

Or perhaps...

"May you always integrate my upward mobility with my desire to not have children."

Both are perfectly worthy prayers… Read full post »

I don't mean you. You reading this as this exact moment, no siree. You probably don't apply.

I mean the you, you lot of women out there who at some point in your adult lives proclaimed, "I want to be treated like a princess." Or "I am… Read full post »

57622111---russell_brand"Get Him to the Greek" is funny. It's thoughtful. It's like "The Hangover" with more drugs, more money, more furry walls, and zero police (that's what happens when you're rich, the police lose interest in you). It's lead character, Aldous Snow (he who must be gotten to the Greek), is… Read full post »

As if this isn't the most Glenn Beck-ish, egotistical post ever - I won't lie to myself, it totally is. *Guffaw* I'm allowing myself to do this because corporations are allowed to spend unlimited funds telling you how to vote, I should be socially sanctioned to do the exact same thing… Read full post »

Editor’s Pick
MAY 11, 2010 11:17PM

The Misery of Chasing Bubbles

2007_Lamborghini_Murcielago_on_fireSeveral months ago, I had a brief fit of wanting to write an expose' type blog about the coincidental side-by-side pacing of the housing boom and the popularity of television shows about rich fucktards like The OC, The Simple Life, and MTV Cribs. I had it all worked out.… Read full post »
Editor’s Pick
MAY 7, 2010 1:31AM

The REAL American's Guide to the Stock Market

stock-market-chartSince the sordid soap opera love triangle of banks, the government, and bailouts began in late 2008, we haven't seen much horrifying activity from the stock market. Horrifying activity from the job market, yes, and that shall continue to stay that way. I wouldn't expect God to shit out a… Read full post »

Arizona just signed a law into effect that will made "illegal status" a crime. Arizona won't just be wasting money placing non-violent drug offenders behind bars, they may be incentivizing police offers to seek out illegal immigrants. They are creating a punishment that… Read full post »

Editor’s Pick
APRIL 15, 2010 2:09AM

Elitism is Real and it's Making the Tea Party Bigger

Whoa, OMG, WTF...the Tea Party made me think a thought beyond, "how do I stop these people from being relevant?" But it's still in that vein.

 It made me wonder: am I an elitist? 



And why do I give a a rat's ass? Because if I am guilty of… Read full post »