Okay, so let me get this straight. The world is supposed to end on December 21 of this year, because the current Mayan calendar runs out on that date and some New Agers have decided it means humans are kaput. 

Here we go again. We’ve been down this path before. Recently, as in just a few months ago. Remember that conservative Christian guy, Harold Camping? 

Because of some biblical passage or another, Camping was convinced beyond the shadow of a doubt that the Rapture was upon us, which means the souls of the faithful ascend into heaven and the rest of us remain behind to wait out the final fiery obliteration of all life on planet Earth. What fun.

After the Rapture didn’t happen on May 21, Camping went back and re-examined his passage and said something to the effect of, “Oooops, I made a mistake, actually the world is ending on October 21.” Wrong again. 

One more strike and he’s out, though doomsayers are never without their share of mainstream media attention, not to mention followers, no matter how many times they’re wrong. 

It’s not the Mayans who are saying that the world is doomed. In fact, some Mayan leaders in Guatemala have denounced all the New Ager hype about the apocalypse coming four days before the holiday formerly known as Saturnalia. Talk about putting a damper on Xmas shopping. What’s the point of spending all those hours standing in line to get into stores where you run the risk of being pepper-sprayed as you reach for that to-die-for gift for Aunt Ethel? 

The Mayans believed that their gods created three worlds that didn’t cut the muster and then this fourth one in which they placed human beings. The first three worlds lasted approximately 5,000 years each and then went bye-bye in that big bang sort of way. Lots of special effects. Since this latest one started on August 11, 3114 BC (according to folks who know how to correlate the Mayan and Gregorian calendars), its lease expires on December 21. What happens then is anybody’s guess. Mine is that life goes on as usual, boring as that may sound.

Let’s face it, the only end of the world scenario that makes any sense at all is global warming and that won’t obliterate the planet itself. It just means Mother Nature finally gets rid of its worst mistake: the naked ape that it gave a bigger brain and the ability to speak. She’s tried to off us with floods, earthquakes, volcanoes, you name it. We always manage to survive, much to her regret.

I don’t want to sound like one of those aforementioned doomsayers, but our time is limited on this third rock from the sun because we are our own worst enemies. How else do you explain our wreck-less disregard for our air, water and soil? We should know better since we’re kind of dependent on all three. Unfortunately, we’ll learn the hard way, when the ocean rises and farmland turns to desert. 

If only we had an exact date. That might help people take it more seriously.