And when I say fat people need to eat more, I don't mean they need to eat more  food like leafy green lettuce and raw broccoli. I mean they need to eat more food like ice cream and pizza and french fries - and eat them on a regular basis. 

I was inspired to write this post by another blogger (not on this site) who scolded fat people for not accepting their need to eat less in order to lose weight. She suggested fat people were somehow too childish to accept the  reality that they need to push themselves away from the table sooner than they'd like to - and should just stop having temper tantrums about it.

Grrrr.

Folks, I've been thin (still am) and I've eaten chocolate. I can tell you unequivocally that chocolate is better. I'm not saying there isn't a tremendous amount of social benefit that comes from being thin (just as there is from being white and heterosexual). I'm just saying that those social benefits are irrational, and not worth living a life of restriction and self-denial.

I used to be "fat" by society's standards.  But at five foot five,  I was only about 200 pounds. I was not the "obese monster" I tried so hard to be. And yes - I did try. I was a very sick young woman. I did not wash or make eye contact. I did not want anyone near me. I literally sought to repulse people. But despite eating whole loaves of bread and half gallons of ice cream and party-sized bags of m&m's - I could not crack 200 pounds. I pretty much exhausted myself trying to get and stay fat. 

I gradually dropped eighty pounds, but not through dieting. I lost the weight by going to therapy, and losing my fear of being touched. Let me repeat that - I did not diet. I did not weigh myself. I did not restrict my food. The focus was on reducing my fear, not on reducing my ass.

I am NOT claiming that fat people are fat because they fear being touched. No way. I believe I was an odd case, because I consciously sought to be fat. I believe most (not all) fat people are fat because they fear being fat. I also think that's why anorexics starve and why bulimics vomit. I think the fear of being fat -not high fructose corn syrup, not white flour, not partially hydrogenated vegetable oil -is what's fueling the obesity epidemic in our culture.

Let me say, I think high fructose corn syrup, white flour, and partially hydrogenated vegetable oil are horrible things to ingest.  There are plenty of yummy fattening foods that don't contain those things. But fattening foods don't make people fat. The stress of self-imposed starvation makes people fat.

When you restrict your food, your body loses all faith in you. It thinks you are a raving lunatic and a threat to its survival. It ceases to see you as a friend. It begins to perceive you as a nut job determined to destroy its central command center: the brain. 

To the body, hunger is a form of drowning.Try holding your  head underwater 'til you pass out. I'll bet you can't do it. Your body won't let you. Neither will your body let you restrict food for very long. It will fight you with a vengeance. It will hijack your will and drag you to the nearest vending machine. I know you won't want to eat. I know you'll be crying and cursing at yourself while you do it. But you will eat the junk food - FRIGHTENING  quantities of junk food -because those will be the fastest, most efficient forms of calories available. As a matter of fact, if you skip enough meals, the urge to binge will take root in your head and fire off like a loose canon every time you experience stress, good or bad. And you will be absolutely powerless to resist.

Not only can you not fool Mother Nature;  you can't out-wrestle her, either.

Dieting is a type of arrogance, another ludicrous attempt to conquer the natural world.  If we can make peace with the fact that food is as necessary as air, and  that we terrify our bodies when we skip meals,  measure every bite we consume, and  try to maintain a weight that is lower than  nature intends for us - we may see the obesity rate begin to drop.

Until then, at the very least, let's stop picking on ourselves and others for being fat. If judgment and criticism made people lose weight, we'd all be skeletons. Being fat can be uncomfortable (though not as uncomfortable as starving) and it is related to certain health risks (just as being underweight is related to certain health risks). But being fat is not a crime. It is not a "bad" thing to be. No one deserves to be chastised or humiliated for their body size.

Imagine a world that makes room for Fat Beauty. Wouldn't that be fun? To love your fat beautiful body so much that you proudly take walks every day, without fear of  people oinking at you from their car windows. To get regular medical checkups, because the doctor no longer shames you on every visit. To feel peaceful in the presence of delicious, sensuous, life-giving food. To thrive in your own skin.

I ache for us to be infected with a flesh-loving epidemic. Until then, at the very least - savor your food today. Enjoy it. Let it nourish you.

You deserve it.