Women’s Petite
Department at Sears
I knew I’d wind up here
kidded myself
about buying tee shirts.
I sit in the only chair
the one near the dressing room
wait for her come out
twirl, ask how it fits
and I say perfect
especially the way
it brings out the blue
in your eyes.
Friday night
we found an excuse
to go out
and I got to see her
model the dress again
this time
I’m in the dressing room
with her
this isn’t Sears
hang up the dress
let me see
those blue eyes.
Old habits die hard
I go to the hardware department
seeking the comfort of
familiarity
among the hammers and pliers—
no matter how hard I try
it’s just not the same
all I see are those blue eyes.
John A. Bayerl, February 6, 2012
It's been like that all weekend; a soft and gentle sense of missing Gwen's presence in my life. The weather continues to be exceptionally sunny, warm (at least for February in Michigan), so I'm able to get out and do things, go for walks, first thing you know I'll take my bike down from the ceiling in the garage.
Yesterday and today I spent time at the mall. Lots of good end of winter sales, so yesterday I bought things. I used to wonder why Gwen would do this, buy things, bring them home, then bring them back to the store. Today, that's exactly what I did; brought back all the things I bought yesterday.
While I was a the Sears Store this morning I found myself wandering through the petite women's department where Gwen loved to walk around, look at things, sometimes try them on, ask my opinion. It is such a a gift to be able to find the love Gwen and I shared deep in my heart by merely wandering through a department store and feeling the sad longings that acccompany sweet memories.
It always comes back, Dear, to those special, secret things we shared. Not only does love come as a gift, it also comes with gifts that may be opened way off in the future--I opened one of those gifts today.
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Comments
Toast to you tonight and the twirl. So many good small jewels.
There is much comfort in the familiar, but it can be disconcerting as well. I realise you already know that. Pax tecum....
But she can't....so she revisits whenever she has the need. Maybe it is that blend of sadness and comfort that helps lead to some sort of peace.... Oh, jeez, I'm rambling tonight. I leave it with something simple: A lovely post, as always.