1. Mr. Spot*, did you witness Data and Tasha Yar in a compromised romantic position?

Unfortunately, that incidence occurred before my time. Data did keep a hologram image of her and often takes it out to view it. I can tell that he misses her and thinks about her.

2. Had you ever regurgitated a hairball on Data’s bed?

Once, I did leave a hairball on his bed. I was thoroughly punished by having to witness his fascination with it and watching him take it to the lab to analyze it.

3. Since Data was not human and didn’t need to sleep, what did he do during his off-duty hours?

During his off-duty hours, Data was busy reading Sherlock Holmes and visiting the holodeck to re-enact his favorite parts of the stories. He had read War And Peace 20 times and Don Quixote 15 times. He especially liked reading about human interaction. He also liked to look up new information about science and technology on his computer.

4. Did Data clean your litter box nightly or did he have noncommissioned personnel do it?

Data was fascinated with biological organisms. He often took my stools to the lab to analyze what I have eaten since I often don’t like the food formulas he invents. He found soon after the results come back that I have been give table scraps.

5. Had you ever witnessed Data’s pre-duty hair routine?

Yes, Data was a creature of habit with his hair. He liked to do it the same way everyday.

6. How often did Data pet you?

Data started out with a schedule for petting me, but he soon realized that I had my own ideas about when to sit on his lap and when to wander off. The schedule became a failure that he had trouble at first understanding.

7. Did you sit on Data’s lap often?

Like all cats, I made my presence known to him when I am hungry. Otherwise, I sat on his bed or escaped out his door into the rest of the ship to see if I could get some more table scraps.

8. Inside sources say that you have changed appearance and gender over the years and have outlived the natural life of a cat. Are you a shapeshifter or a Q entity?

That would be telling. My inconsistencies in appearance and gender were never noticed by Data or the crew.

9. Data once wrote a poem for you. What did you think of it?  I have included the poem for our readers:

Spot's answer:  Yes, sometimes Data did things that were inconsistent with what someone will be charmed by. Cats may come to appreciate poetry, but it never has the same effect on us as it does for humans.

#The word "gramatically" is misspelled.  The correct spelling is grammatically.  Such misspellings is the charm of the I Can Has Cheezburger? jokes.

*I addressed Spot as Mr. Spot since when referring to officers on the Enterprise male and female alike are addressed as “Sir”. Also, even though Spot did appear as a Somali breed cat when first arriving on the Enterprise, he is now a orange-striped cat. In cat genetics orange-striping is a male gene, just like calico is a female gene. Even though there are exceptions, this rule remains consistent.

Further Star Trek news:

After the success of the 2009 Star Trek movie that revamped the old storyline from the original series, J.J. Abrams is in production to make a second movie dubbed Star Trek 2 by fans.  There are suggestions that the movie will have a strong villain aspect in the tradition of the Wrath of Khan, but the villain will not be Khan.  The movie is slated for release June 29, 2012.