Let me start by conceding there will probably be many innovations in the near future as the new administration has already acknowledged the connection between new inventions and a growing economy. The two go hand-in-hand and surely the next ten years are going to be very exciting for us all.

I foresee the introduction of a personal GPS that expands global positioning into one’s own self, philosophical planes and relationship navigating (e.g.; no more “Seriously, Paul, where is this relationship going?” or “No, that’s not it...no, still cold...getting colder...colder...OUCH!!! Okay stop now!”). When one says they took off some time “to find themselves” they will now have the proper means to do so.

I predict hats which announce your thoughts through the use of theta waves and LCD message board technology á la Times Square saving much time telling off rude pedestrians, ordering food and making the exchange of transparent pleasantries near obsolete.

I see dolphins finally having their own shows on satellite radio.

But the innovation, which will have the biggest impact on our future culture, is one that addresses two of our biggest problems at once; the planet and the economy (specifically the fuel and energy crisis). Before I unveil what this fantastic idea is, it’s important to understand why other “big ideas” failed.

An example is the Segway, the “personal transporter.” A sure thing that would instantly change the world, right? Despite Paul Blart: Mall Cop’s take it’s first few weekends, this space-age shooter really has gone anywhere. And that’s because one looks silly using it.

Look at electric cars. The reason they didn’t take off is because they literally wouldn’t take off. It looks silly to do zero to 60 (mph) in, well, never. It’s not cool to drive the speed limit or to have to return each night of your road trip back to your starting point in your garage to plug in your car.

 The other problem with this plan is that it would mean our whole country would have had to clean up its garage and that was never going to happen. This country’s romance with the automobile is about the freedom to hit the open road (preferable with a vehicle that is huge, powerful and with enough headroom for God-knows-what.).

That’s what we’ve been conditioned to believe. That’s cool and there is nothing cool about electric cools. Or cars with large solar panels mounted on them. Who would be caught dead going out with them? For any new innovation to have any chance it needs to be cool.

Another example—if it weren’t so damn impractical, domesticated jaguars would be a big seller. Dangerous, sexy and flying at speeds of 80 mph–car companies already use leopards and jaguars as metaphors in their television ads. But who uses an electric toaster or electric fan to sell a car?

That next innovation that’s going to save our planet and economy needs to be served up as cool. If energy conservation was sporty AND competitive we would have this problem licked.

I suggest a device that is a self-contained personal energy source. For convenience purposes, let’s call it the iWatt. Like an iPod, this cool looking device is worn around your neck and plugged into the appropriate adaptable instruments to collect more power. That device can be a piece of exercise equipment, or special footwear or an iWatt-supported headband worn during sex. Like a generator your body’s movement is then translated into storable energy (or watt-hours). This is already being done in gyms in Minnesota except everybody is leaving their energy in the gym.

As anyone can see there comes a built-in demand for new products to accommodate this new life-style. Yes, it would take a long time to facilitate this system but it would be a lot shorter than the time it’s taking for the whole world to buy and switch to an alternative fuel automobile and to replace the current infrastructure with a new one. That undertaking so problematic that it is one of the leading causes as to why we haven’t been able to kick the crude oil habit.

Like cell phones, the ultimate goal is to be wireless and render (electricity) landlines a thing of the past.  

The incentive to collect watts is not only financial and environmental but competitiveness fueled by tracking how much activity you’ve done. Users of the iWatt invariably will be bragging how much energy they have on them because finally there is something that actually monitors your daily activity.

• You’ll want to top how much energy you have over the poor slob next to you.
• The country would be healthier for it and medical insurance and costs would decrease.
• Society would be less reliant on energy companies and feel more empowered by the fact they could actually generate their personal ration of energy.

The general feeling has always been that the big oil companies or whoever are the only ones who can make a difference. With the iWatt everyone feels like they are really participating. They see a difference so they feel like they are actually making a difference. Nobody can really make a difference by themselves but if everyone THOUGHT they could, then maybe everyone would get on the same page, have a sense of responsibility to their personal share and actually collectively make a difference.

That explains how the competitor in Americans would be driven by pride and ego to accumulate watts.

To explain how the iWatt actually CONSERVES energy is to understand the most amazing side effect in this process. The iWatt creates the psychological effect in which each user will never be more aware of their own usage when having to create their own supply and seeing it physically and visually be depleted from their iWatt.

What is the first thing dieters are taught to do to lose weight? To keep a journal. If every citizen on the planet had to write down his or her personal carbon footprint there would probably be no better deterrent to wasting energy. Right now everything is already plugged into the wall, a wall that shows us no use of valuable resources. Just a wall. Wearing an iWatt, plugged into your whatever you’re using, you’ll see it draining and it will be your gut instinct to be thrifty and look around for the nearest stair-master or iBroom.  

What is going to make the iWatt ultimately work and forever change our culture, is not it’s functionality or practically but it’s coolness factor.

Nobody is going to want to be left out of the energy conservation craze.