I walked past Candy slowly.  Never mind her impatience with me, at least this walk would be at my own pace.  My suitcase wasn’t heavy.  I mean how heavy could a bikini, pajamas, Cuddles (my stuffed animal), a small bag of make up and toiletries and a couple of wigs be?  Yet I walked as though it weighed a ton, both of my hands wrapped around the handle, squeezing the handle tightly.  My knees knocking it with each agonizing step.

“Come on...” Candy prodded.  She pushed my shoulder guiding me to turn to the right and up a couple of steps into a smaller door. I pushed it opened and entered.  Smells of cooked food assaulted my nostrils.  At first glance it appeared to be a kitchen of some sort.  Candy walked around me, “Hi honey, I’m home!”  She proclaimed loudly, laughing her low laugh.

“Sh-h-h-hush.  You came at a really bad time.”  Some woman in a soiled pink uniform and white apron wearing a bad wig supporting a bouffant hairdo said to her.

“What’s up?”  Candy asked, looking a little confused.

“Oh Lordy girl, we’re in lockdown mode.  You can’t come in now.”  She was motioning for to us to leave.  Candy looked at me, then back at her and approached her and whispered something into her ear.  She said something back in a lower voice, all I heard was,”....stolen...”  Candy stood there watching this woman as she dialed a number on the black phone on a table.

With that Candy turned back to me, “Come on, we gotta go get a hotel room, our cab is on his way back. Shit!” 

Just as quickly as we had entered, there we were, hustled back outside.  The headlights of our taxi illuminated us just as the buzzer rang.  She pushed the gate open once again.  Totally confused, but not about to argue I climbed back into the cab followed by Candy.  “We need a motel room for the night, if you can suggest one, not too expensive okay? 

“Sure. You want me to put your luggage in the trunk?”

“Nah...it’s fine here.”  Then she whispered, “Buffy, lay down on the seat.”  I felt her hand on the back of my head.

“What is going on?  What did she mean by lockdown?”  I bent down as far as I could.  It was dark, we were moving and I wanted to know why we were going to a motel somewhere, and not staying in Mustang.  My heart felt as though it would escape my chest had I not been bent over  squishing my chest against our suitcases.

“Apparently some girl has gotten her money stolen and the police are on their way.  Nobody can come in or leave.  We’re just lucky we got out in time.” 

“When can I sit up?”  I whispered above the sound of my thumping heart.

“When I do, you can.  Now shut up while I think.”

I could hardly complain, I didn’t know what the heck was going on, but a motel sounded pretty good to me.  As soon as I could feel the smooth highway beneath us Candy sat up.  I raised back up, happy not to still be bent down smelling what was probably old puke on the floorboard carpet.

I looked out of the window, watching headlights heading past us on I-80.  Soon a vacancy sign came into view at the Lucky 8 Motel.  Being still fairly early I figured we would probably be able get a room.  Candy asked the driver to wait while she got out and went to the front desk to check us in.  “Wait here, I’ll be back with the key.”

Well hell, where else would I go?  I had no idea where we were now, but the thought of a bed and a hot shower were inviting.  Anything that delayed what I dreaded was coming.  She returned shortly and paid the driver. I grabbed our suitcases and got out when the driver opened the door for me. 

I followed her to a room on the second floor.  She put the key in the door and opened it.  I stepped in when she turned on the light.  The room was pretty standard, a couple of double beds with striped bedspreads, a small round table with a chair, and a plastic orange colored lamp hanging above it.

“You stay here, I gotta go find a payphone and get a message to Serge where we are.  He was going to call us at the Ranch later to make sure we were settled in.  He’ll worry if we aren’t there.  You can shower if you want.  Just don’t go anywhere.”  Then she grabbed her handbag and left.

I went into the bathroom, it looked clean enough.  I went back and opened my suitcase on one of the beds and got out my pajamas and bag of toiletries.  I was exhausted, but I knew a shower would help me unwind.  What a day.  It had been exactly 18 hours since we started, and the first few hours I had spent crying.  All I wanted was to go to sleep and forget this day.

I had showered and gotten under the covers by the time Candy returned.  “Oh good, you’re in bed.  I left word at the Ranch where we are.  God I need a shower.”  Candy tossed the key with the oval brown plastic hanging from it onto the table. 

“Yeah, it feels good...I’m so tired.  Goodnight .....”  I fell asleep even before the shower turned on.

I was startled out of a deep sleep by the sound of someone banging on the door, yelling something.  “Candy... wake up, someone’s at the door.”  The urgency of the knocking was frightening.  Pounding. Pounding. 

“Huh...oh shit...” she got up and went over to the door.  “Serge...that you?”

“Yes, open the damn door.”

“You’ll wake everyone up, hold on.”  She slid the lock open and unbolted the top lock, opening the door.  I sat up and turned on the lamp.  What the hell was Serge doing here in the middle of the night?

Serge was standing in our room, and he looked as rough as I felt.  “I got your message.  I stopped to have a bite to eat just the other side of Reno and figured I would give you a call.  Betty told me what was going on and where to find you.  Hi ya kid..”  He removed his black leather jacket, and draped it over the chair. 

“Hi Serge.”  I yawned, irritated to have been awakened.  I wondered what time it was. 

“You gals okay?”  Candy was now sitting on the side of the other bed.

“Yeah hun, we’re fine.  Come on to bed.”

I nodded and fell back, wanting to go back to sleep, yet wondering who he would sleep with.  Serge came over and kissed my forehead.  “Go back to sleep.”  It was not going to be me..  I should know he isn’t going to show me any real attention with her there.

“I am.”    I rolled over facing the other bed in time to see her stand up and press her body against his.  I watched as he turned out the lamp.  In a moment my eyes had adjusted to the dark and I could see Serge was undressing.  His white underwear was practically glowing in the dark against his dark skin.  I had never seen him in his underwear before.  In fact, I was sure I had never seen him in less than full dress before.   Candy was already in bed and made room for him. 

Oh God, please don’t let them get it on...and I rolled over to face the wall.  I heard their sloppy kissing, sheets rustling and murmuring...and I squeezed Cuddles closer to me.  What in the hell is happening here, have they no feelings?  I began to cry again, muffling the sounds of my pain in my pillow.  So much for Serge loving me.

“Wake up Buffy!  I brought you some coffee.”  Serge was standing over me. 

“Ohhh, can’t I sleep a little longer....”  I was agitated, and seeing him only reminded me of this whole mess.  I groaned.

“Up and at ‘em kiddo, we got an appointment.”  He seemed like his old self, smiling and familiar.  He acted as though last night had not happened; like I didn’t know what happened in the other bed.

I sat up and tried to blink myself into being awake .  I could hear the water running in the bathroom, a reminder we were not alone.  “Okay, I’m up.”  I threw back the covers.  “Gimme the coffee.”  Serge handed the small Styrofoam cup to me and I took a sip, then another. 

“What kind of appointment?” 

Serge walked over to the table and reached into a brown paper bag extracting a donut...”Want one?”  I shook my head “no” as he bit into it and sat down in the barrel shaped chair.  He grabbed a napkin and took a sip from his coffee.  “I’m taking you to meet a friend of mine, Joe, Joe Conforté... he owns Mustang Ranch.”  The sound of running water stopped.   “Honey...would you bring in my underwear please?”  Candy yelled through the door.

“Hang on...”  I watched as he scooped up the bra and panties from their bed and open the bathroom door.  Steam rolled into the room, she took the clothing shut the door quickly.  “Hurry up....Buffy needs in there too ya know.”

About a half an hour later Serge was carrying our stuff out and putting it in the trunk of his El Dorado.  I settled into the back seat while Candy sat up front, emphasizing her place with him; by his side.  Then we were off.  We drove awhile until finally on the outskirts of Reno we turned onto a residential street.  The houses were mostly two-story and seemed new.  We drove up to one with ornate wrought-iron gates and a tall fence.  A couple of German Shepherds were off to the side barking their heads off.  I had a deep distrust of dogs, particularly German Shepherds ever since I was a kid in Greece when one of our neighbors’ dogs had bitten my leg.  He was supposed to be friendly.  Yeah right, all I wanted was a couple of figs from their tree, but ended up with a bloody thigh.  Fortunately I didn’t have to go through the rabies series of shots like my baby brother did when an unknown dog bit him.  Fourteen shots in the abdomen while he screamed bloody murder, and I could do nothing. 

Serge parked in the driveway.  The three of us got out and walked to the front door, with me following them.  He rang the bell and a rough looking, messy blonde woman, dressed in a red and white print housedress that was mostly covered by an old fashioned apron, answered the door.  She didn’t look happy. 

“Hey Sally, Joe’s expecting us.”  Serge flashed his pearly whites while nervously fingering the zipper on his jacket.

“Come on in.”  She stepped aside and we walked in. 

My eyes were wide open, all of the furniture was so...fancy and ...tacky at the same time; the all white carpet, heavy baby blue drapes, and the upholstered white couch had curly, gold painted, carved wood arms.  Next to it gaudy crystal lamps sat upon glass topped tables.  The coolness of the room contrasted with the heat outside.  I stared long enough to make Candy grab my arm.  “Come on.”

We walked into a dining room where a slicked back, black-haired stout Italian man sat in a zebra covered chair, cutting up a plate of sliced tomatoes.  A radio was on to some baseball game.  He looked up and motioned for us to sit down, “Come on in...want something to eat?”  He quickly shoveled in a mouthful and chewed. 

“No thanks Joe.  You know Candy here...and this is the gal I told you about, Buffy.”

He watched me sit down.  I was wearing a brown print skirt and a beige shirt, one of the only things I packed.  I had worn one of my wigs, a favorite blunt cut pageboy style with bangs, this one in shades of light brown with blonde streaks.

“How old are you?”  He asked between chews.

“I’m twenty-one.” 

“You sure?  You don’t look it.” 

“I’m sure.  I have a two year old son too.”   He looked unimpressed.

The blonde woman was working in the adjacent kitchen, scrambling some eggs.  I could see she had a limp as she moved around; a cane was leaning up against the counter.  The back of her hair was mussed, as though she had only gotten up.  Weird.  I always noticed hair.

Serge and Joe were making small talk.  Candy looked out of the sliding glass door into the backyard.  It was just dirt, dirt and chain link fence.  This guy has some kind of fascination with chain link fences.

“So Buffy...nice name.  You ready to join our place?  Serge tells me you haven’t worked before...is that right?” 

“Yes sir.  Thank you.”

Joe chuckled repeating me, “ Yes sir...” as though he had never heard someone address him as sir.  Maybe not, what did I know?

“Hey Sally, this here is Buffy, she’s going to be working for us at the Ranch...they tried to get in last night you know... but that uh-h-m... little problem kept them away.”  He chuckled again, then looked over at me, motioning to the to the blonde with his fork.  “This is my wife, Sally, she runs the joint.” 

Sally nodded at and took his now empty plate away, replacing it with the one holding the eggs.  “You want some juice darling?”  Her singsong question sounded insincere.

“No, just some more coffee sweetheart.”   His answer sounded insincere too, but maybe it was just that he was tackling the eggs with gusto. 

I could not help but notice she seemed much older than Joe.  She didn’t have a speck of makeup on.  I thought wearing some might soften her looks some.  He said she was the one who ran the brothel?  She sure didn’t look like a madam to me, not that I had any references to go by... except maybe Miss Kitty from Gunsmoke, or my imagination, which had been dead wrong so far.   

We sat there, all of us watching him eat, the silence only broken by the voices on the radio in the background, and the coffee splashing as she refilled his china tea cup.  I felt uncomfortable, to say the least.  The red-flocked wallpaper, the fake zebra...it was way over the top from anything I was ever exposed to.  Even his coffee cup was...too delicate for this gruff guy.  When he finished the last of the eggs you could hear him as he sucked his teeth trying to get a piece of his breakfast loose.  Ugh.

“So you guys are on your way over now?”  He dabbed the corners of his mouth with a white cloth napkin.  It struck me how some things he did seemed so practiced, and unnatural.  Most guys would just wipe their mouth, not dab at it.

“Yeah, just wanted you to meet Buffy and make sure everything was good to go this morning.”  Serge smiled at him.

“Yeah it’s fine.  I’ll stop over tonight.”  With that we were officially dismissed.  Serge stood up, Candy got up and went into the kitchen taking Joe’s dishes in to Sally.  I saw her kiss Sally’s cheek and then we were ready to go. 

“Do good Buffy.”  Joe said as we left. 

I couldn’t help but think “doing good” did not mean the same thing I was thinking.  The three of us loaded back into the car and headed back to Mustang.  This time Serge was taking us all the way to the door.  There would be no more delays, no more false starts for me.

I guess I was ready now, as ready as I could be.  At least the tears were over now.  I was all cried out and my mind numb.  I knew for sure where I stood in Serge’s little dysfunctional family.

It was not a warm room, quite unlike any kitchen I had ever been in.  Kitchens being a natural gathering place for women, this was no exception.  The place was bustling with women in bikinis, however, not your ordinary morning coffee group.

“Buffy? Are you still with me?” Candy stood there with a look of irritation.

“I’m sorry, just looking around.” I don’t know why I was sorry, I had every right to be checking things out. After all, it wasn’t every day you found yourself in the kitchen of the only legal brothel in the country.

“I want you to meet the people that you will be working with. This is Jeannie, the cook, and this is Bev, the day manager.”

“Hello. Nice to meet you both.” I could not get over how striking Bev was, tall and well built, a clean, wholesome, scrubbed face framed by a pixie haircut. I could see traces of grey in her hair, though she did not look that old. In contrast was Jeannie, a black woman about fifty, who also seemed to have a pleasant friendly manner.

Bev called me over to the desk. “Let me issue you a pay card first, then we’ll find you a room.”

The pay card turned out to be a three by five card, on which she wrote my name. She took a ruler and drew three lines that bordered the card, explaining the space in the top represented five dollars, the bottom ten dollars, and along the side was for one dollar.  Then she took a standard hole punch from the desk, explaining a hole would be punched in the sections that corresponded with the amount of money I checked in.

“Remember, the first thing you always do is check the money in...then look over here on the paper, find your name on the top and write underneath it how much money you checked and circle it. When you’ve finished with the trick, come back in here and write in the time you finished. One more thing: don’t lose the card, or we can’t pay you. Most of the girls keep the card folded in half and tucked inside the back of their bikini bottom.”  I was listening intently, not wanting to miss a thing. “You take room number 25, just two doors down from Candy. She’ll show you the way. I’ll be in to talk to you after you get settled.”

I wondered how she ever got there, she seemed so out of place. Candy and I gathered up our belongings and headed for the open door, the door into the parlor.