Who are you anyway?

Really good question.  I've been trying to figure that out.  When I was the new kid in my tiny Kansas community, the other junior high girls made fun of me calling me "Miss America" behind my back.  What an insult!  It was an insult wasn't it? I was always the outsider, the person the principal called in to tell me that he was afraid to let me loose in the halls because of my independent thinking.  Oh, yeah, I wasn't selected for National Honor Society either even though I had all of the other awards and criteria. I had refused to take the teacher's class who was the Head of it, and in the interview, I told them that I DIDN'T MAKE MY BED EVERY MORNING. Oh My God.  And I felt fat. It took me years to actually get that way.  At least I am in good company.

In Japan, I would describe my jobs to tell about myself, according to this OSer, while in the United States, I would give internal characteristics to tell who I am.  So maybe I should tell you about the jobs I've had, or perhaps the strengths and weaknesses I've discovered through years of introspection?  Maybe a little of both.

What kind of jobs have you had?

Oh, the normal run-of-the-mill jobs that  every mom has over a life time: Founder and editor of my high school newspaper, lifeguard, waitress and dishwasher in Yellowstone Park in Wyoming, archaeologist at Truman Reservoir Project, Computer Lab Director for same, Bookkeeper for Accent Press, Office Manager for an employment service, Academic researcher and grad student in UMC Higher & Adult Education, writer, videographer, part-owner of a video company, entrepeneur, business and computer consultant, equestrian riding instructor and farm owner, horse trainer, District Commissioner of Pony Club, investor, yoga instructor, permaculturist, meditator, seeker.

What are you most proud of?

You mean besides my three brilliant, kind, beautiful, artistically and literarily talented daughters?  

I am proud of what I am learning about myself.  I understand some of my short comings, and attempt to keep people around me that compliment me, that is, that MAKE UP for my lacks.  I have trouble being on time, so I am comfortable with telling people to be sure that they tell me to be somewhere at least thirty minutes before they need me there (and don't tell me they did that.)  I am an enthusiastic starter, but I peter out on projects if it doesn't hold my interest.  It is important to me to follow through on commitments, but I sometimes overcommit so I have to watch myself.  I like being in charge, but I don't always have to be right.  I admit when I'm wrong.  I feel good about my spiritual life and meditation and Buddist and Hindu study, that now I am much more peaceful and tolerant of people with differences most of the time.  I am especially good with kids and animals.  But with peers and my kids, I can be a "pleaser" and don't always say what I need to say, or I say it and it comes out wrong and stupid.  Oh, and I'm a bad housekeeper, from long line of bad housekeepers.

What are do you do for fun?

Fun?  Um.  I love to read and write.  I absolutely love travel, and I love stories.  Especially stories that are well written like the ones by so many of the excellent writers on OS.  I have been addicted to reading my whole life.  My mother would yell at me for reading in the car...at the table...while I was walking...because I wouldn't see anyone waving to me, or anything going on around me.  I have always had this internal radar that keeps me from running into things while I read and I only occasionally miss the curb when reading while crossing the street.  I also love to do yoga, dance, and exercise.  I used to run, but quit that when my husband objected to my leaving the infant twins in his care from six a.m. to seven a.m. every morning.  Running blew out my knees anyway, so now I walk whenever I can.  Oh, I also eavesdrop on any conversation I can, and take notes.

What is your current project?

At the moment I'm torn among several projects.  I have begun work on a co-housing eco-village and permaculture farm, called Forest Garden Community Farm, that will be designed by a wonderful eco-architect, Roald Gundersen.  We are planning our experimental gardens for this year, and going to have an educational component, along with a CSA (community supported agriculture) as we develop our plans.  I am pulling together a bunch of progressives from around here.  I have the acreage, and am looking to put it in a land trust for the community.  Fun huh?  

I have a 109-year old Victorian three-story house in town that was flooded in Cedar Rapids floods last summer, so I have to finish renovating that since the entire first floor was destroyed.   It has been a real mess, and I hate to spend money on it that I will never get back, especially if I have to do it on the cheap and don't get to do a bunch of green renovations.  That would make it a lot more appealing to me.

I have been accepted to a couple of graduate school programs, one is a PhD program in California and the other is a MBA program in Fairfield, IA.  I am very tempted to go for the MBA in Sustainability at Maharishi University in Fairfield.  I really need to learn more about creating this eco-village.  The thing is, I do need to visit eco-villages around the country/world to learn more about setting one up, and the graduate programs really tie me down.

I have a couple of kids who are still "at home," who are working on moving along  into their own lives but haven't quite left home yet and still seem to need me around.  One is autistic and bi-polar, so has been a bit more dependent.  Any minute now, they will leave home.

I want to write a book or two, and take as many writing seminars as possible,  and take a trip around the world.  And dance lessons...I want to take ball room dance lessons, and learn English Country Dance.  Um...did I mention that I might have a bit of the...bi-polarish type stuff too?

Well, it looks like you will be busy for a while...

Oh yeah, have you heard of "Heifer International" where they give farm animals to people in poverty around the world and teach them to care for and breed them and use their milk and meat or whatever?  I want to do that on my eco-farm.  It's really cool.

Hum.  No wonder your husband left.

Is he gone?  Gosh, I thought something was different!

Well, thanks for your time.

Come by anytime...the door is always open!