Still figuring things out

JULY 30, 2009 4:26PM

sobbing

Rate: 3 Flag

My father in law is dying of cancer. he is in a ton of pain and is slipping into a coma. he isn't expected to last even 3 weeks. I don't even know if I can go visit him. He is one of the best men that I know of, and has been such an inspiration to me. I love him so much. I am so sorry that I have been such a disappointment to him. I stayed with Kristin for as long as I could, but I am sorry that our rift has hurt him so badly.

 I can't stop crying and I don't have anyone to cry with. I am so sorry that all of this is happening to her at the same time. I did my best (what hollow words). 

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I want to see him so badly. I am not supposed to even call them. I sent him an email but I don't even know if he could read it.
Charles, why can't you call them?

I am so sorry for you. I don't know what you're going through. I pray that your ex has a strong, supportive community. You need community too.

I know you've let go of religion and I'm not advocating it. But sometimes it helps to pray or meditate or go for a long bike ride and listen to nature.

Sending strong hugs.
I'm glad you sent him an email; at the very least, you have expressed yourself and are not holding those feeling inside until it is too late. I hope you find peace with this situation, and very soon. Please know you are not alone as long as you have us. Hugs.
perhaps you can express your love through a card, and try to resolve your issues

you are in so much pain
i am sorry