Fork in the Road

C'mon, you can take it.
NOVEMBER 30, 2008 1:15PM

Paul Newman's Will

Rate: 6 Flag

Okay, here's your chance to see the last will and testament of one of the great Americans of the past 100 years:

Butch Cassidy

Butch Cassidy

"If he'd just pay me what he's spending to make me stop robbing him, I'd stop robbing him."

 

aka Cool Hand Luke

Cool Hand Luke

"Sometimes nothing can be a real cool hand."

 

aka Henry Gondorff

Henry Gondorff

"No sense being a grifter if it's the same as being a citizen."

 

 

Aka Fast Eddie Felson

the hustler

"You know, I got a hunch, fat man. I got a hunch it's me from here on in. One ball, corner pocket. I mean, that ever happen to you? You know, all of a sudden you feel like you can't miss? 'Cause I dreamed about this game, fat man. I dreamed about this game every night on the road. Five ball. You know, this is my table, man. I own it."

 

 

Frank Galvin

Frank Galvin

"You know, so much of the time we're just lost. We say, "Please, God, tell us what is right; tell us what is true." And there is no justice: the rich win, the poor are powerless. We become tired of hearing people lie. And after a time, we become dead... a little dead. We think of ourselves as victims... and we become victims. We become... we become weak. We doubt ourselves, we doubt our beliefs. We doubt our institutions. And we doubt the law. But today you are the law. You ARE the law. Not some book... not the lawyers... not the, a marble statue... or the trappings of the court. See those are just symbols of our desire to be just. They are... they are, in fact, a prayer: a fervent and a frightened prayer. In my religion, they say, "Act as if ye had faith... and faith will be given to you." IF... if we are to have faith in justice, we need only to believe in ourselves. And ACT with justice. See, I believe there is justice in our hearts."

 

even Reggie Dunlap

Slapshot!

 

aka many cool others, aka Mr. Paul Newman.

Here's his will.

So were you named?

Lucky you!

Mr. Newman specified in his will that his likeness never be used to promote foods that are not of the quality of those now produced by Newman's Own, like the popcorn and the spaghetti sauces. That may leave some wriggle room though, if one uses Newman's Own Salsa as a benchmark, one of the few strikeouts in the lineup.

Sidney Pollack, Oscar-winning director for "Out of Africa", who also died this year, had directed Mr. Newman in "Absence of Malice". In an industry brimming with outrageous behavior and on-set demands by actors with outsized egos, Mr. Pollack said: "Paul Newman arrives with no baggage. Except maybe a sixpack."

Mr. Newman went some lengths in his will to make sure that all profits from all Newman's Own products will continue to go completely to charity, one lasting magnificent gift from a great, great American.

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In that case, Merope, here's Fast Eddie, added for your viewing pleasure. Sorry he's not around to give you a call anymore. But as he famously said: "Why go out for burgers when you've got steak at home?"