“Give oranges,” said the voice.
I looked up from doing Christmas cards on our dining room table. No one else in the room. It was a grey, cold Sunday afternoon. Maria was lost in a frenzy of baking. She bakes the way Michelangelo painted the ceiling of the Sistine Chapel. Maybe even the way Gandhi walked the dusty streets of a village.
Christmas music filled the house and fueled her every motion. The football game played without sound as the Chicago Bears played without heart.
“Give oranges,” I heard it again.
“Honey, I got to get something upstairs, I shouted into the kitchen as she danced from the stove to the sink and sang, “OK.”
Climbing the stairs and walking into my closet where all the important stuff that wouldn’t fit anywhere else was tossed in a big white plastic bin, I pulled out the yellow envelope and slipped out the death certificate.
January 12. 2007. Yep. My Aunt Mavis, the Buddhist, was still dead.
Almost two years now. Still sometimes I check. Especially when I hear a voice saying things I don’t understand. Like, “Give oranges.”
It’s usually her.
Walking back downstairs and looking out the front window at the tiny bare tree on Grace Street where I could sometimes feel her presence, I remembered the Zen “Koan.” One of those stories that demands a second read before it even begins to make sense. She loved those kind of stories.
“One day as Manjusri stood outside the gate, the Buddha called to him, "Manjusri, Manjusri, why do you not enter?" Manjusri replied, "I do not see myself as outside. Why enter?"”
I heard Mavis laugh and clap her hands with delight and then recognized her voice saying once more “Give oranges!”
Walking into the kitchen, I pulled a book off the shelf that I had bought just after she died. “The Seat of the Soul.” It was by the author of “The Dancing Wu Li Masters,” one of Mavis’s favorites. I bought the book thinking about how I’d never get to talk to her about it. Then put it on a shelf unopened.
Today I opened it. It had been long enough.
What if, the book said, there were more than the 5 senses we humans use to make sense of the world?
Imagine how good that orange would taste. Tossing up the orange and catching it, I can see and touch its skin. Shaking it up next to my ear I can hear a faint sloshing. A taste like a thousand summer nights. And the smell is heavenly. But that’s just 5 senses. What if there were more?
What if a “multi-sensory” (as author Gary Zukav calls it) person; could expand the channels through which they take in the world? What if my personal frame of reference somehow grew to the size of a blue and endless Montana sky?
Would Glen Beck weeping start making sense to me? This could be terrifying.
Then I heard her say again, “Give oranges!” And I still didn’t understand.
I walked into the kitchen where Maria was unraveling dough like an ancient rabbi rolling out a Torah.
“Well, this year didn’t turn out like we planned,” I said. “Turns out the world didn’t change in a year.”
“Does the world ever change in a year?” she asked.
“Probably not, I answered. But I sure wish we could buy each other all sorts of cool Christmas presents. I wish we could take that trip out west.”
“I know. But we’re making it. We’ll get by. We have everything we need.”
“I think what I want for Christmas is an orange, “I proclaimed.
She’s used to hearing things like that. It’s been almost 14 years now. So she just smiled and said, “OK!” Then she ramped back up into her baking speed and I went back to the dining room to finish up the Christmas cards.
I sat down, picked up the pen, and as I did, I heard Mavis say, “So you’re not really finished with your book are you?”
“No.”
“And the last part, the unfinished part, is about ?"
“Stewardship. Taking care of something I don’t own. Something infinitely bigger than me.”
“Like the stories? That other project you’re working on to celebrate a million different stories? Ones never even told before? ” she asked.
“Mavis, I said, (now it was my turn to roll my eyes) you already know all that! I’m the one that knows nothing! What I don’t know isn’t just about oranges, I don’t even know if I’m on the right road! I don’t know the next time I’ll see a paycheck! I don’t know what the doctor will say! I don’t know if Maria and I will be living in our car 6 months from now!
“Do you have a story to share right now?”
“Well yeah. But it’s kind of long. No one will listen to it here. People don’t have the time . . .”
“Is it the best Christmas story you know?”
“You mean besides the first one?”
“Yeah smart ass. Besides the first one.”
“It is.”
“Would a Buddhist like the story you’re about to share on this clip?”
“As much as a Buddhist would like emptiness?”
And that’s when I heard her laugh the loudest. I looked outside and it had begun to snow in Chicago. A gentle snow that stilled the troubled ground.
“Ok, I said, “I’ll share the story. It’s called “The Train. It’s by a group called “Celestial Navigation.” I don’t know how much you’ll like the middle part. But I am certain you will like the end. Maybe we could talk about it when we’re done?
Maybe if you just told me where I could find you? Where you'll be?
And Mavis answered, “Remember Steinbeck’s story? Remember what Tom Joad said to his mother when she asked him that question?”
“I’ll be all around in the dark. I’ll be ever’-where - wherever you can look. Wherever there’s a fight so hungry people can eat, I’ll be there. Wherever there’s a cop beatin’ up a guy, I’ll be there. I’ll be in the way guys yell when they’re mad - I’ll be in the way kids laugh when they’re hungry an’ they know supper’s ready. An’ when the people are eatin’ the stuff they raise, and livin’ in the houses they build - I’ll be there, too.”
“That’s where I’ll be,” she said.
“So what do I do now?”
“You listen. Listen for stories like the one you’re about to share.”
“Ok. I can do that. But what’s next? That’s the scary part! What’s next? What do I do next?”
“Give oranges, Roger. Just keep giving oranges.”


Salon.com
Comments
heheh my mouth was watering for oranges throughout...
(btw, that's my colour too).
Thanks Roger--Happy Holidays to you!
:-)
A perfectly colored post, perfectly balanced.
I love the thoughts you shared, love Mavis, and took the time to listen to The Train which, I have to say, is best heard with your eyes closed.
Thanks Chi Guy.
There are more then 5 senses.. Trust me I know there is. I would not lie to you on that part.
Very enjoyable and great post.. Love your stories and the video was great too.
Happy Holidays..
Seems like all of life is a Zen Koan. Or else, a poker game played in a pitch black room.
Merry Christmas to you and yours, Roger.
Naughty or Nice?
Nice! Oranges! 1 rate. Five whip snaps! ; ) xox
R~
There is the Osage Orange Ball.
It's a green Osage Orange Ball.
It's as big as a sot baseball.
I looks like a shriveled brain.
Osage Orange for pantries?
FOX. Fleas and roaches flee!
Glen Beck needs 4- balls, Oy!
Four Osage Orange in britches!
Shame on FOXs stinky polecats!
Merry Christmas Roger.
Lisa—They surprise me when they turn out well! Happy Holidays!
Susanne—That is very cool. Sounds like there is a sermon in that story for you. Merry Christmas!
Mission—You have handed a few out yourself!
Scupper---Exactly!
Beckster---thank you for stopping by! I’m never on the front page---I’m sure they gave the memo to the new editor, so a new person who just happens by is always a treat!
Scanner— Actually my Dr just told me I’m 10 lbs overweight. That can’t be from the beer. . .
L and P—I will pass that along. (To Maria---not Mavis, Mavis of course already knows.) And I know smiles will abound! I LOVE those tiny crates. They are like abundance in wood for 6.99 and ya can’t beat that!
Bike---Thank you and back at you. I am always grateful when you, as a local guy shows up, that’s been a real gift this past year.
Robin---Yea!!!
Rita—Right now I imagine her having a cup of tea with Studs Terkel, who is enjoying a martini. But when you wrote that---she knew!
Lea—You got it. Living daily with unknowns. AND it’s where so many of us live.
Frank—I hope you closed your eyes when you listened to that. Driving north of Chicago this afternoon I heard it for the first time in a car, in a snowstorm. They only play it on one station. And it’s usually only on a Saturday morning the week before Christmas. And there really is nothing like it anywhere. I’d guess it would fall flat to anyone under 30, (except for some of the old souls in that age group who sometimes find there way here to the Back Page) Because it’s not really a video---but it is one of the best stories I’ve ever heard.
Bill---I got to go visit you. What’s wrong with me!
Shiral/Melissa---Caught it! And Seems like all of life is a Zen Koan. Or else, a poker game played in a pitch black room. Is on my list of best comments anywhere. You are a very wise woman.
Fireeyes---I do believe that. Check out the book. You’d like it!
Owl—Mavis would have liked you a lot. She’ll come visit you. When you least expect it.
Km---happy everything!
Debbs---I am so glad you heard it. It never gets old.
Skel---YOU’RE cool!
Chuck---YOU are the Pulpmaster! See you on the Train.
Melissa—Have you noticed how good you are at reminding me of the important stuff I often leave out? Don’t stop that!!!
Stacey---You just gave it back.
Spudman---Thanks for listening to that “video”. And isn’t it amazing that an orange is like some sort of universal Christmas present?
AHP—That really good one is yours.
Espiritgui—You got it. That’s it in a nutshell!
Lorraine---Thank you. I love it when people who actually know what they are doing say that.
UCC Fan—Hey---that picture looks like the one on my refrigerator!
Cat---It was your idea.
Lunch Lady---thank you for coming by. New visitors are special treats here!
SM—Back at you Orange Woman!
Kathy---Happy Holidays!
Steph---If I can make somebody hungry with words---it’s been a good day.
Thanks Lefty!
Life for rent---thanks for asking. I was brought up with an appreciation and reverence for all religions. My Mom took us everywhere for church. And she was the music teacher of a reform Jewish Temple. She recently published a book on the Jewish Renewal. And my Dad didn't go to church.
My ancestors were Moravian. I was called back into a Christian Church about 7 years ago---and now we attend 2 different churches---feeling not totally at home in either.
I hold all the eastern religions in deep reverence. Have tried to read the Koran before and have not yet succeeded. I have a copy of both the Bible and the Tao Te Ching next to my bed---along with a lot of books by Eugene Peterson who is probably better than any human I've encountered at explaining Christianity.
One of the things I love most about Buddhism is the absence of duality. Because I think duality and hierarchy have done so much harm across the centuries---that and rigid belief systems that leave out the real heart of religion which I believe is mystery.
I do believe in God and in the risen Christ. I am not real impressed with worship of a vague nothingness. But I think the statement "I am a Christian" is as meaningless as the statement "I am a Buddhist." Because both can mean literally ANYTHING.
I much prefer what unites rather than what divides. Which might be one reason why I will never appear on the os front page. Drawing readers, as I've seen it practiced by the incredibly rigid hierarchy of salon, requires division. Not unity. And the cadre of people on the "in" in the salon hierachy is as rigid as any of I've encountered.
So I always found myself on the "out" And I'm sure the new editor has already gotten the memo---whatever you do---IGNORE this guy! Especially since he is NOT New York or SF. That's why the fact that I get such consistent reader support is so important to me.
All of that division speaks to the dualities that Buddhism teaches does more harm than good.
But I write here, for now, (even though I won't forever) because it's good practice and because I so like so many of the people.
Despite the fact that rigid closed circle of salon insiders can, like so many religions, cause pain to those on the outside. Those on the inside talk regularly, their art fills the offices of those at the top of the salon hierarchy. Those on the outside don't even get basic business courtesy. But there is such talent and goodness in that outer circle that I'm not ready to say goodbye.
So I try to make the most of being on the outside. Like a religion. All churches are run by people not God. They are all imperfect. So you try and find the good parts and concentrate on that.
So I guess my answer to the question "Are you a Buddhist?" would be---and I am honestly not being a smart ass here--- "Have an orange!"
Rated and appreciated.
We feel a strange San Francisco connection with you, and ForeverMom likes oranges for Christmas, too.
~fatRocco and feralRusty
So treats for all!
Deb--It isn't always easy. So much noise downs it out!
Harriet--Cloves! Perfect! Hand me some!
CK--Welc0me!