Chrissie Pissie (Christine Terepora)

Never be too old to dance in the kitchen or kiss for no reason.

Chrissie Pissie

Chrissie Pissie
Location
Hamilton, Ontario, Canada
Birthday
March 17
Company
Retired!!!
Bio
I learned long ago not to take myself too seriously. No one else does.

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Salon.com
APRIL 17, 2011 11:13AM

One More Interesting Belly Dance Class...the Second One

Rate: 6 Flag

Did you know that there are THREE muscles in a row, horizontally, above the pubic area? The teacher told us to focus on crunching them one at a time. I was in the process of developing an aneurism when the lady beside me felt sorry for me and told me to focus on my ovary area. Now I was confused as well as frustrated because I'm not really sure I know where my ovaries are. Aren’t they a little higher than the pubic area? Some students were trying to look as though they knew exactly what she was talking about. Some of us had expressions and seemingly spastic convulsions as we tried to find the elusive muscles. The spastics must have outnumbered the gifted because the teacher told us to pretend we had a pencil in our vagina and were drawing a circle on a piece of paper.

Now we were cooking! Sex had been tossed into the mix. Obviously, some of the ladies were repressed because they groaned in disgust. Hey, it worked for me..... I was way past circles.... I was writing my name!

The teacher tried to apply the moves she had taught us by making up simple little dances. We looked ridiculous. I accidentally caught a glimpse of myself in the mirrored wall. I had been telling myself my moves were sensuous and this type of dancing was perfect for a rubinesque women like me. The vision that I saw was anything but sensuous. I looked more like I had a live electrical wire up my backside!

Something that was a definite positive happened during class. I had popped my knee the week before and had been uncomfortable ever since. At some point while trying to move with some degree of fluidity, I popped it back! Doesn’t say much for my style, but the knee was back where it should be.

I staggered out of class and saw my husband, Adam, waiting for me. He prudently said nothing.

This week I wore my little coin scarf...... I think I tied it too tight.... didn’t hear too much jingling. Should have bought the expensive one; it had lots of little noise making coins.

Adam and I were going to Cuba so I would miss the next week’s class and I decided I might practice my moves in the pool. Did you hear about the isolated tsunami in a pool in Cuba?

©  Chrissie Pissie 2011

 

 

 

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OK, this cracked me up! Please let us know on the day when you write an entire blog with that pencil you are concealing!!
LOL
I could do none of this.. I can still dance to 'ring my bell' though.:)
rated with hugs
It takes guts to do this and then to write about it - ooops no pun intended ! :-)
♥R
The pencil idea has me intrigued. Writing my name, hmmmmmmmm!
rated with love
You've been cracking me up for over 45 yrs. and I don't think that will ever end. Great story, friend. -R-
Thank you, dear friend...... continued patience is required on your part.
Thank you ladies.... I have retired my pencil as classes are no longer offered at the rec center and I refuse to humiliate myself by going to a studio where they expect you to make progress. I have reached the age where if the exercise is not fun, I won't do it. And would you believe the dancer in the video is me and I have nothing more to learn!?!?!?! Didn't think so.
I'm so sorry there's not a sequel! I've been trying ton find those muscles...but it's hard, with all these feathers....
I am not kidding. Just yesterday I told the story of how, in my youth, a boyfriend accused me of having such a vortex in the area of my skirt that if a pencil was laying on the floor and I walked by, the pencil would "disappear."

To think that all these years I too could have been writing my name! In blood!!!!!!!!!!!
Does the sensitivity of some people.... not to mention their way with word, never cease to amaze!!!
OMG! This took me back to my belly dancing class 35 or so years ago. Great!!
Maybe you've found the cure for writer's block -- just stand up and start writing in Belly Dance. Great post!