NEW YORK.  Heterosexual males stormed NBC studios in Rockefeller Center today following a Today Show interview in which wholesome, middle-aged Meredith Baxter-Birney revealed she is a lesbian.

Meredith Baxter-Birney:  Say it ain't so!

"We have to draw the line somewhere," said Rob Houchens, a union carpenter.  "It's one thing for the Wanda Sykes of the world to go over to the other team.  It's a whole different kettle of fish when they start recruiting fresh-faced gals like Meredith."

Wanda Sykes:  Funny, but you can have her.

Baxter-Birney starred in the 80's comedy "Family Ties", in which she played the liberal, former hippie mother of a conservative son played by Michael J. Fox.  The show was cancelled in 1989 when George H. W. Bush succeeded Ronald Reagan as president.  "The idea of a kid idolizing Reagan was funny," said TV critic Ellie Newsome at the time.  "The idea of a kid idolizing Bush was just dumb."

Baxter-Birney with Michael Gross:  Maybe he grossed her out.

Baxter-Birney has been married and divorced three times.  Hollywood gossip columnists became suspicious of her sexual orientation when she was spotted on a Caribbean cruise traveling without her hyphen.

"We want her back! We want her back!"

Efforts to "de-program" women who renounce heterosexuality have generally failed.  "You think of how your man snickered during 'Grey's Anatomy' and always left the toilet seat up," says former housewife Pamela Lee Norndorf.  "Then you're overcome by the memory of his beer burps."