WASHINGTON, D.C.  The U.S. government reached its legal debt limit of $14.3 trillion on Monday--$46,000 for every man, woman and child in America--but avoided default on its debt when it received an unsolicited credit card in the mail on Tuesday.

Geithner:  "24% isn't too much to pay for a cash advance over the weekend."

"The nation can rest assured that the federal government will use this new credit responsibly, unlike all the other cards in our wallet," said Treasury Secretary Timothy Geithner as he swiped the new card at a Starbucks outlet on K Street to pay for a grande iced mocha latte, hold the whipped cream.  "And give me one of those blueberry scones while you're at it," he added, angering several patrons in line behind him.

"z-z-z-z-z"

The federal government immediately transferred $7.2 trillion in balances from a Fifth Third VISA card to the new "secured" debit/credit card, thereby earning 1,500 bonus miles that can be used on the second and fourth Tuesdays of each month.  "These will help us reduce the cost of sending Vice President Biden to funerals of minor dignitaries around the world," Geithner said.

The U.S. will pay a higher rate of interest on new purchases and cash advances than previously, 24% as opposed to 18%, but Geithner defended the switch as a matter of necessity.  "We tried to get a home equity line of credit on Maine," he said, "but they turned us down because it's just a vacation state."