CORK'S AWARD-WINNING BLOG
- July 27
- Former TV on air critic dude, full time freelance writer and author, who for decades earned his living primarily with his sense of humor. Now in the Blogosphere, at BreakingSatire@Blogspot.com. Lifetime honors include seven Emmys, two kids who are not messed up and the same wife he started out with. You may twit with him at “OldCootCork” befriend him as “John Pesky Corcoran” or Linked in with John "The Cork" Corcoran.
MY RECENT POSTS
- You Can't Get Ebola from
October 18, 2014 03:17AM
- Spokesrat Shot; Cops Suspect
September 23, 2014 05:52PM
- Kids and Punishment: Is God a
September 19, 2014 12:10PM
- Is Siri 6 Unstumpable? Or
Sucketh Like Cinco?
September 11, 2014 04:39PM
- Baseball Isn't Dead; It's Just
Small, That's All
September 06, 2014 05:10PM
MY RECENT COMMENTS
- “The right wing, intent
on destroying the planet to
the profits of the
October 18, 2014 11:23PM
- “No I don't feel I'm too
old to gawk at beautiful
September 16, 2014 08:40AM
- “Just a little bit...I
used to love baseball, but
interest over the
September 07, 2014 12:27AM
- “Great advice. I wish I'd
read it earlier. A few years
made a significant
July 12, 2014 02:40PM
- “I have a Woody Allen
story. It's a good one, but I
to go out with the
June 14, 2014 09:11PM
OldCootCork Corcoran's Links
A letter sent to my Aunt & Uncle about what cannot give you Ebola. I hope it will calm their fears and those of readers and their relatives, too
Dear Aunt Millicent:
Sorry for taking so long to get back to you. Dipping your letter in disinfectant before you sent it… Read full post »
Mr. Charles E. Rodent, beloved Spokesrat for a chain of restaurants that serves good pizza to badly over-adrenalized children, was shot and seriously wounded last night while dining at one of his establishments. He is listed in critical but stable condition but is expected to squeak through.
Mr. Rod… Read full post »
“All people can be divided into two groups. Those who divide people into two groups, and those who do not.”
According to Google, either Mark Twain or James Thurber said that, a witty commentary on the faults of statistics and stereotyping. Events in the news lately indicate the latest br… Read full post »
My lovely wife was calling on a borrowed phone to tell me she had forgotten hers. Would I be a lamb and check a number for her in her iPhone directory?… Read full post »
The first baseball game I ever saw was at the Polo Grounds in New York City. My Dad took me more years ago than I can remember.
The Polo Grounds was then home to the New York baseball Giants. The stadium is long gone as are the baseball Giants,… Read full post »
Recently I was asked what advice I might give to someone who wanted to become a professional writer. Since bash-your-head-in wasn't an option, here is that advice.
*Read. Write. Repeat.
*Ask yourself if a life of poverty is one that you can fully embrace.
*Learn to write well… Read full post »
I take a bunch of pills every day. Some are prescribed by doctors. Some I find under sofa cushions. Still others are “suggested” by my wife, who is currently ranked third most qualified non-medically trained pill expert in the Known Universe.
I recently looked up the pills I… Read full post »
There were nuts in plain sight in the kitchen the other night.
Salted Pecans. Roasted and still warm from the oven. Naturally, I dug in.
My wife arrived and took… Read full post »
12. If there is a tougher officiating job in sports than Soccer Referee, I don’t know what it is. You’re always running, nobody speaks the same language, everybody flops, you have to watch 22 people who cheat, the fans may kill you, and nobody, not even you, is exactly sure wh… Read full post »
There was no other sound quite like it.
First I heard a thunderous deep bass rumble, soon joined by a high-pitched, banshee howl. The thunder shook me, and the howl had me plugging my ears. It came from the biggest thing I had ever seen in the air.
Nobody hates golf like a bad golfer and nobody misses playing golf more than a bad golfer forced to give up the game. I recently had to turn in my spikes, my sticks and what few balls I had left when one of my ankles decided it would no longer cooperate… Read full post »
I’m a big David Letterman fan, but I’ve just seen a young upstart blow the doors off the late night talk show race. If Dave’s not worried, he’s either not paying attention or decided to take early retirement.
I think he’s paying attention. The fact it’s tak… Read full post »
Sam, it's your old buddy Cork, from back in the day? Remember me? Channel Nine? Hope you haven't confused me with Roger… Read full post »
The world is divided into two types of people: Those who would like to live a long life and the Scientists of the world who want to send us to an early grave.
According… Read full post »
Investigative Blog BreakingSatire has obtained a leaked email sent by StNick365 to the editors of Time Magazine that shows Santa Claus may be far less jolly than his popular image would indicate.
StNick365 is one of Mr. Claus’ personal email accounts, but is the writer San/… Read full post »
I’m knocking this out waiting for The Rug Guy to arriveth. According to the Missus, this is Mission One in getting things spiffed up before the Holidays.
The Rug Guy is a generic term for whoever cleans our carpets. He drives a truck filled with massive sucking devices, tubs/… Read full post »
When I was in the military, I had all four of my wisdom teeth yanked by a civil engineer posing as a dentist. He used a Roto-rooter and a backhoe to operate. It hurt like hell. It hurt worse than hell. It hurt like giving childbirth in Hell.
Had… Read full post »
Is Gravity so nice, you must see it twice? If so, do you race out to theaters before it makes way for the Christmas onslaught or catch it on DVD after it scores its predicted haul of Academy Award nominations?
I couldn’t delay—a blank page waits for no one—and af… Read full post »
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