I finally finished “Fifty Shades Darker” the sequel to “Fifty Shades of Grey.” Finally, I finished the arduous experience that was reading that book. I think it had rather the opposite effect on me that it’s had on most other women-it made me seriously consider of life of quiet celibacy. Congratulations E L James you made sex seem like a chore and not sexy.
Perhaps they should hand out that book to people struggling with sex addiction. They could give to womanizers,and manizers (what is the woman version of a womanizer?) Those books could be used for some as the modern day equivalent of aversion therapy. You wouldn’t even have to be strapped into a chair(though that might make it better) you’d just read them and you’d be cured.
My friend Mo was shocked that I hadn’t read them.They are so popular and I like to keep up on popular culture. She had read them on a plane and found them diverting enough, well at least the first two.She assured me that they weren’t too S/M and if I wanted to be in the know and understand the various parodies, I needed to read them.
I really like the movie “Secretary” which deals well with the story of two very, damaged people who fall in love with each other along with bondage, discipline and various other kinky sexual activities. I don’t usually go in for that stuff but for some reason it really works in “Secretary.” It’s a very good movie; check it out if you haven’t seen it.
So I thought that since I liked “Secretary” maybe I’d enjoy “Fifty Shades of Grey” too. And I did kind of enjoy that first book. It was readable and I zipped through it. I’d call it dopey good fun. The most shocking aspect to it wasn’t the submission and domination; it was that a man that messed up would change for the love of a woman. That seemed to be the biggest fantasy element of all- seriously he is willing to give up his sexual bent for her love?
But I found many aspects of the book annoying. The author uses the word “clamber” at least 22 times.No one can just get into a car or bed, they have to clamber into it. Clamber is such an odd word choice; people don’t usually use it in ordinary every day conversation. I know I’ve never said that I clambered my way down the frozen food section at the grocery store or that I clambered onto the elliptical at the gym. Okay true I never use the elliptical, it kicks my butt, but I still would never clamber onto it. I would climb or step or even maneuver. She could have used the word "mount" which strangely is never used at all, even though there are so many descriptions of sex in the book.
Then there’s the old fashioned way the character refers to her vagina as “her sex” as if suddenly instead of a modern day submission and domination love story we are reading some 19th century erotica. Come on people, vagina is a very hip these days.
In addition to Ana, Christian, their various friends and family and his ex subs, there are the two additional characters in Ana’s head- her inner goddess and her subconscious, that appear regularly through-out the books. The references to them are some of the more irritating aspects to the novels and they pretty much drove me crazy. If that freaking inner goddess did one more “happy dance,” I think my head would have found its own wall to bang against. I guess I should say “hit” instead of “bang.”
I give props to E L James. She wrote some popular “Twilight” fan fiction and it morphed into these hugely successful books. Some people say that she is single handedly saving the publishing industry. Kudos, bravo and you go girl.
It seems to me that the Grey books are less a kinkified “Twilight” (though obviously Christian Grey looks exactly like an older Edward) but more an updated “Jane Eyre.” Christian is Rochester, brooding and handsome and Ana is Jane, insecure but still a fighter. Instead of an insane wife, he has crazy ex-submissives. Oh the difficulties when you have finished with a sub, trained her to be totally dependent on you and she can’t let go.
An other friend gave me the second and third books in the series. She didn’t want them; she couldn’t get through the first one. I felt obligated in a way to read them. It was if I didn’t want to waste a book. They might get better, I might miss something.
But reading “Fifty Shades Darker” was torturous- no pun intended. The constant sexcapades with him “filling” her sex up and the inner goddess performing the dance of the seven veils with only three veils and the subconscious worrying that vanilla sex might not be enough for him. It comes down to the fact that I just didn't care about these characters and what they did.
There is so much sex in the two Grey books I read that I didn’t find titillating in any way. They did not inspire me to get to know myself better. It was as if the Lifetime network made porn-somewhere there is a story about the empowerment of women but it’s lost in her succumbing to both her desire and his. Oh and the other lesson is it is okay to enjoy being rich and to enjoy the lifestyle of the very wealthy. Don’t beat yourself up about it.
I saw a fake movie trailer for "Fifty Shades of Grey" starring Matt Boomer and Alexis Bledel as the two leads. I think this is inspired casting and I hope Hollywood follows whichever rabid fan made this trailer. Bret Easton Ellis said that he thought Matt comes off as too gay to play Christian and I disagree. I think he would be perfect. He is breathtakingly gorgeous, a great actor and likable, which Christian Grey ultimately has to be. Matt and Alexis could make me care. This is the rare instance where the movie version will be better than the original novel version.
On Facebook a guy I know wrote that it was refreshing to have an adult book that adults were talking about.He was referring to the fact that so many adults, especially women are into “The Hunger Games,” “Twilight” and “Harry Potter.” But all those books are much better written and more compelling than the “Grey” books. Way better.
I am guilty of loving the Young Adult books. I read them all the time, even some of the not as popular ones. Does this mean I can’t enjoy a so-called “mature” book? No, I can as long as the book has a great story and relatable characters. I didn't identify with either of the main characters and I didn't like them much either.
Here’s one of the reasons I’m irritated with forcing myself to finish “Fifty Shades Darker” I could have been reading Jane Eyre. A great friend of mine lent me her very beautiful copy of the book and it has been just sitting on my shelf.I feel ashamed to admit that not only haven’t I read the copy she so kindly lent to me, I have never read that novel at all. I consider myself an avid reader and yet I never read “Jane Eyre.” My "avid reader" badge should be revoked.
I finished reading “Fifty Shades Darker” and the final book in the trilogy “Fifty Shades Freed” is right next to me. Do I read it just to say that I read the whole trilogy and honored the gift of the books or do I just give it away and read something good?
Life is too short to be spent reading something that I don’t enjoy. I’m not begrudging those who do enjoy the Grey books.In fact if I chose to not read the last book I can give them all away sooner to somebody who appreciates them. Both my inner goddess and subconscious are nodding their heads in agreement.