FEBRUARY 27, 2015 10:04AM

the incessant battles

i wake up.  i feel good.  i send a fax thats been needing to be sent.  i say i got a long day ahead of me, lets make some french toast.  i dont need to go to the breakfast place - i already have their bread, i have excellent cinnamon, and… Read full post »

FEBRUARY 25, 2015 3:36PM

imagine being a bulldog

imagine being only about 12 inches tall at the shoulder, with the top of your head, as you walk, maybe clearing about 17 inches.

and imagine if when you walk, you dont stride purposely forward, but instead, each time you pick up your foot it slides downward and you scrape the… Read full post »

i started to write a comment to donna carbones post, and it was so long i came over and made a blog instead, but i dont have much time so forgive me if its not perfect.
 
so yes, the movie fifty shades came out.
the box office set records.
FEBRUARY 20, 2015 10:13AM

minefields of social media.

facebook, specifically.  becoming less useful to me.

i now avoid politics, so there are many posts i would have read historically, that i dont want to read now.  i can no longer afford the pall they cast.  i am powerless in my own life, let alone worldwide.  so i will continue,… Read full post »

ah, i cant tell people this in real life, so that means you get stuck hearing it.

you know i am going to san diego.  you know thats where the former love is.

i thought i had reached equilibrium where he is concerned.  to say i hardly think of him anymore… Read full post »

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FEBRUARY 17, 2015 10:37PM

i need you tonight

for the first time in a really long time

to explain the word bathos to me.  i have already looked it up, and its not clicking.

you would effortlessly explain it, then use it in a sentence that would make me laugh.

i shall cluck my tongue a few times

and… Read full post »

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FEBRUARY 17, 2015 8:23AM

lacking excitement

so, i have been sick for the past week plus, and right when i started to feel better, the meds i am on kicked in and started making me nauseous all day long.

son is having some troubles.  things are not yet getting better there.

the cold.  i mean, the cold… Read full post »

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FEBRUARY 15, 2015 10:30PM

fill in the blanks

caveat:  this is NOT mine.  i copied it from someone who said they saw it somewhere.

******* 

It's his/her loss. _________ missed out on probably one of the best opportunities of a potential relationship that he/she will ever have in his life because I am _________, _________,

________… Read full post »

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FEBRUARY 13, 2015 10:10AM

a single violet is the whole wide world

keith asked me this morning how come whenever he disagrees with me, i yell.  i said i have told you before, bc i dont care about things only a little bit.  i am not casual on most things i find worth talking about.  i feel them in my gut, and disagreeing… Read full post »

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FEBRUARY 9, 2015 9:05PM

YES to book! a friend is going to help!

so this friend had ALREADY offered to help, and i totally forgot bc when i am stressed, you know it all snowballs and i am not high functioning then (you do the math on that!).

so i am going to go see her today at 3 oclock, and she will help… Read full post »

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FEBRUARY 9, 2015 11:04AM

i miss my mommy

i didnt always feel unsafe in the world, you know.   i used to ride in cars with drunk drivers, with music blasting, rolling and smoking joints. well, i didnt roll them, cause i wasnt coordinated.

i got separated from people and wasnt afraid of not finding each other again.

i… Read full post »

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FEBRUARY 8, 2015 6:13PM

a good thing, or two.

i DID get selected to go to an academic conference and give a poetry workshop.  i feel super fancy, and one of my friends joked that she was going to call me professor.

i feel its important bc it increases my cred, on paper.   makes a library or after school… Read full post »

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FEBRUARY 4, 2015 6:00PM

i had a breakthrough in group!

PLEASE

go watch this first

then come back.

i only asked you to watch first because it kills me.  i laughed so hard when i first saw it, which i think is 15 years ago now, that i still remember it, and laugh every time i think about it.  insolent.  … Read full post »

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FEBRUARY 3, 2015 6:01AM

gratitude fails me today

too much cold, too much snow, too much not getting done what needs to get done bc the day off i have each week

every week

is a snow day

and i cant get the things done.

i NEED to help my son gets his GED

which requires offices and… Read full post »

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if  you follow this link and watch the sketches, you will laugh.

also, bonus laughter in the videos their links lead to.

laughter, the best medicine.

  Read full post »

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JANUARY 29, 2015 11:45AM

and they keep on coming, the blessings.

i am going to san diego.  to visit.  to get warm, and eat some yummy food, and sit by my friend's (heated! yes!) pool, and among all her flowers, and share our stories, and go to the ocean, and go to my beloved balboa park.

i get to go to that… Read full post »

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no really.  thats what she says.

sarah palin speech in iowa.

good people, hard workin'.

and she says, "this great nation."

more than 50% of american school children qualify for free or reduced price lunch.

thats sure "great."  Read full post »

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went for a ride today and recorded a couple poems for public radio (not N public radio, not National.  but still fun to say.).

then, since we werent too far away, we went to cracker barrel for lunch.

it was delicious.

i asked keith if he thought i was the biggest… Read full post »

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ok, so my son moved out 10 days ago.  its not his absence that makes the angst less, its feeling better about how he is doing.

he has landed in a good place.

his roommate finds him hilarious.

and when he talks too long about something, as is his wont (maybe… Read full post »

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JANUARY 17, 2015 9:32AM

the pileated's thunking

the geese's honking

the starlings' synchronizing

the finch's twittering. 

the branch's creaking

the yellow chairs' shadowing

the turkeys' quiet garbled gobbling

and sequenced trotting

my son's smiling

my son's laughing  Read full post »

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JANUARY 15, 2015 4:56AM

CALMER GED rant

ok, since i am seriously thinking of running for the board of regents - no, i cant possibly win.  there is zero percent chance of that.  yes, zero.  but MAYBE there is an interview process during which i could be heard by people who have say in such matters, MAYBE there… Read full post »

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JANUARY 12, 2015 11:43AM

grumbly post in which i am productive

so we spent the night before last and all day yesterday washing slipcovers. we have two sets, so there are a lot, if you have been unforgivably lazy and havent washed the alternate set since last time you switched them over...

it was a lot of work.   pretreating and scrubbing… Read full post »

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JANUARY 10, 2015 11:49AM

now through april

writing workshop once a week, and writing that goes with it through the week.

working on the poetry book, which i hope to have at least put in poem order by monday, and hopefully the extra pages, too (dedication, thank you, title page.  those pages. i didnt realize we have to… Read full post »

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my only experience with a devout muslim was 14 years ago, when i lived in chapel hill, when my son was four.  the move to chapel hill was the worst mistake of my life, it was a giant giant fiasco, it was absurd.  we wont talk about it, but i did… Read full post »

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JANUARY 9, 2015 6:13AM

recipe for sadness reduction

society really has gotten to the point that we arent allowed to feel anything, without giving it a label.

i am a little tired of it.  life is hard when you are poor and have a struggling child, and good and bad are intertwined and sometimes we rally better than at… Read full post »

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