This seems to be question day for me. I'm not sure why. I'm tired of not knowing.
So Saturday is still my main club night as we only have one real gay danceclub in Denver these days, and Fridays are out as I'm not a lesbian. (Nor am I wild about sleeping with one.)
I try to adhere to the gayboy code, so every Saturday I try to avoid having bad breath after 10:30. It's OK to exhale curry during the daytime, but God help you on the dancefloor. (And gum and mints only work for a few minutes. They don't have that many mints at Tracks.)
So I try to eat bland foods in the afternoon, but I really don't know what the cutoff time is. Anyone know? How come everyone doesn't know this? None of my friends seem very confident of their answers. Is it just us?
I've heard onion can stay with you for a full day, and garlic for three (in your bloodstream, which your lungs continue to breath out). I don't know whether I picked that up from a reliable source, though, and/or whether those were trace amounts.
I generally get there around 10:30, and they drive us out onto the sidewalk around 1:45. (Bastards! Prudes.)
Today, for example, I was going for lunch at 1:40, and really wanted some spicy noodle from the Vietnames/cajun takeout place. (Yes, that's really a place. Amerasian couple. It works.) Is that too late? Nine hours to metabolize? I took a chance, but didn't really know.
Oh, and how long does coffee breath last? Is that just in your mouth--meaning if I brush my teeth is it over--or does it get in your bloodstream, like spices? In that case, my question is more specific. I like a little jolt before I go out, around nineish. (Does "ninish" take the e? Which is gramatically correct? Hehehe.) I brush right after. Is that OK, or do I need to stick to red bull.
Red bull seems to metabolize more slowly, and keeps me awake six hours later. Plus, Im under the impression that my (liver?) can metabolize both of them concurrently, so that I can get a double jolt by combining them, yet get rid of the two in less time than a double dose of just one. Is that true?
See what I'm dealing with? All these unknowns, they're just driving me crazy.
Please to inform.
Thanks. The Denver gayboys thank you as well. What a pleasure for them, not to smell my stinky breath.
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kfujioka
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Comments
Honestly, as I sit here with my spicy humus and coffee stench surrounding me, I think it's up to the individual chemistry. I eat one stinky thing and I reek for at least 3 days. Karen can have Indian food for lunch, and French encrusted garlic bits for dinner and still taste and smell good.
try drinking more water, sometimes bad breath comes with dehydration.
sciencechick, i bought into the "8 glasses of water" thing before it was debunked, and never fully got off the habit. i could drown a small vietnamese fishing village with the water i ingest. i do like the idea of looking for other variables, but we can rule out that particular one.
btw, i don't usually suffer from bad breath. (i know this, because my friends aggressively inform me when it is an issue when we're out. and we've discussed in less drunken states, too.) it's an occasional issue, and sometimes an issue with others that makes me cringe at being the offender.
(for some reason, i seem to be borderline phobic about being smelly. body odor or breath odor at a club, ugh. what a freaking turnoff.)
it's very close quarters in there, too. and all your friends when you see them the first time for the night, you hug and do the quick peck on the lips, and we may or may not all have our shirts off by this point, and the music is deafening (literally--wow, a literal that's actually correct), so you tend to put your face right up to their ear frequently . . .
any smells, and they are going to be noticed.
and the whole atmosphere is very sexual, and an odor is probably the single biggest turnoff. about a month ago, we went to a pre-party and my buddy patrick and i both had some of the appetizers and thought we were being careful, but both came down with awful breath. so i'm sort of on a kick about this, but always have been. (since i've been a gayboy.)
best to be well scrubbed.
I don't think you can put determine a "safe number of hours." It's always going to depend on what you eat---for instance, ANYTHING with garlic POWDER or garlic SALT much worse than real garlic. Really. Powder/salt, that's the nastiest.
And if you work out and really perspire after eating, the smell seems to disappear more quickly.
The only sure way to ensure no odor from food, is for everyone to be eating the same thing.
But what do I know. I'm an old, straight married chick.
Hope you find your answer.
(ie, is it only freshening while it's in your mouth and a few minutes after, or is it somehow getting into your bloodstream and freshening the crap that's in there? that seems unlikely to me, but i've got limited knowledge. does it really have those powers?)
The "stones" that build up are grayish-white or yellowish-white, & sometimes are visible as little white spots in the palatine tonsils on the sides of your throat.
When accidentally coughed out they reek of death incarnate.
Tonsil stones are hard to get rid of, and a lot of people that have them don't know it; eventually the tonsil stones come loose & get accidentally swallowed and voila, suddenly breath improves. Some sufferers swear by blasting 'em out with Waterpik, or dislodging them with Q-tips or just their fingers."
I have allergies a lot so have to be on constant guard for this, lots of brushing and gargling. Hope this helps
Dave, dittoing advice above about brushing your tongue. And brushing it very well. Most bad breath is from the tongue, not the teeth, and from the very very back of the tongue no less. you have to vigorously brush and/or scrape (there are tongue scrapers) as far back as you can go without gagging. (that's not a double entendre, trust me)
There's a tooth powder I really like at Whole Foods - Ecodent. It's actually mostly baking soda, with minty stuff and other things added to taste better and efforvesce and stuff. You have to rinse well after to get all the little bits of it out or you will have a salty taste left in your mouth, but it really cleans the s*** out of both teeth and tongue. Gives you that "slickery" feeling you have on your teeth after a pro cleaning.
i also swear by those Listerine strips. they nuke whatever living thing is in your mouth. put 2 in if you can stand it, let them dissolve on your tongue and then drink some water and swish it around. they do make me sneeze right after, though.
finally, isn't alcohol one of the best bad breath killers? if you're drinking at the club, i would think that would help. at least if it's hard liquor.
and yeah, stuff can stink up your breath for as long as 24 hours (ever wake up with a "hangover" in your mouth from something garlicky you ate at lunch the day before? i have) if you really want to play it safe, eat mild and/or sweet foods at least all day before party night.
Have you ever been to ComicCon? Man, the place ranks to high heaven. I guess the notion that geeks don't use Sure is pretty much true.
There's some pretty good advice from the comments. But since I no longer hit the clubs--once you hit 40 in San Diego guys look past you--I happily stay home, stinking and reeking like the fat, happy, gay slob I am.
My two turtles love me. That's all that matters...
i was hoping someone would.
a whole new issue to worry about.
the good news on that front is that i never get home till after 2, and try to talk to the guy for a few minutes before we get started (hahaha), so there's an extra four hours in there before i'm likely to be tasted.