I Don't Understand Anything Anymore (Part 1)

Debra Victoroff

Debra Victoroff
New York, New York, USA
September 11
Warner Brothers
Writer, editor, singer, artist. Still adore Obama. He is brilliant, sincere, unpretentious, classy. A true leader, gazing down, bemused, as the petty GOP contenders claw each other's eyes out like 13 year old girls. The country is poised on the edge of recovery, thanks to his steady hand: unemployment is down, the stock market is up, the car industry is back in business, and banks are paying back the bailout money, with profits going to the government. Bin Laden is dead, and our boys are coming back from Iraq, just as he promised. If only he could get his jobs bill past the obstructionist Republicans, who are willing to destroy the middle class simply to regain power, this country would be back on its feet in no time! So glad there is absolutely no competition for his office. All the sane Republicans know there's not one among them that could handle the most difficult job in the world, so they're in hiding, while their two representatives, Romney (aka Romney-the-Dog-Abuser) and Gingrich (aka Gingrich-the-Wife-Abuser) battle it out.

Simply, this article.  Says it all.  Romney was 36 at the time.  I shudder to think where the maid would have sat should he have decided to bring her along.


http://www.foxnews.com/opinion/2012/01/13/romneys-dog-on-car-roof-story-makes-him-unfit-to-be-president/  Read full post »


My First Ever Interview, About My Paranormal Short Story:

“House and Garden”

House and Garden: A Little Horror Story 

(now available for download at Amazon.com or wherever digital books come from)


The author Cornell De Ville (”Lost in the Bayou”, “Cannibal Island”) was kind en

Read full post »

Short and sweet:


Does anyone else have a really bad feeling about this new show that Jerry Seinfeld is producing?  This "Marriage Ref" reality (I think?) show?  Does anyone else have the sick feeling that it is going to be as awful as anything ever produced by network TV and… Read full post »

I recently went to the gyno for a check-up and they had these newfangled devices into which you load all your pertinent info and then you're part of their database.  

 Newfangled Device


So I got to this one point in the questions and this is what it asked:


Which GenderRead full post »

This just in:

 Today it was reported in the New York Times (no byline) that a gang in the remote jungles of Lima, Peru has been kidnapping and killing people to siphon off their fat, selling it to cosmetic companies in Europe.

Gang members have told police that the fat… Read full post »

OCTOBER 13, 2009 2:50PM

What Are You Going As This Halloween?

I haven’t been invited to any Halloween parties at least as yet, but I anticipate this eventuality with the same dread every year.  What costume should I wear?  What can I dress as that does not make me look; 1) fat, 2) like a whore 3) like a fat whore 4)… Read full post »

Editor’s Pick
SEPTEMBER 15, 2009 2:15PM

Horoscopes for People Who Want Specifics



1) ATHENA - the Smart One Who Never Got The Guys Until She Got Contacts (March 21-April 19)

It’s the end of the summer and you find yourself obsessing about the 14 pounds remaining from your goal to lose 15Read full post »


I’ve been wanting to blog on this topic for a while and haven’t had time but OS writer Walter Blevins’ interesting blog on newly “supersized” uniforms for flight attendants (http://open.salon.com/blog/just-walt/2009/07/12/northwest_flight_attendants_demand_bigger… Read full post »

Well kids, it’s happened again.  Forget all this twaddle about people going broke and losing their homes and living in tents and not having enough money to buy milk and bread and Tall skim frappuccinos.

On Monday of this week the New York Times reported (http://www.nytimes.com/2009/06/26/Read full post »

T'was a date that I wanted to happen and did

With a man whose attentions for which I did bid

 With sweetness and batting of eyelids so coated

In make-up I easily noted

That I couldn't life up my own eyelids to see,

The person across in… Read full post »

According to Freud, men have forever been asking, "What do women want?" and let me be the first to tell you.  It's very simple.  They just want a guy who can dress to go out without looking ridiculous.

Guys go out in outfits that could only be attractive to fetishists… Read full post »

Well people of OS – Here is my reportage on the Soiree, aka The Salon, of Salon that took place last night, Thursday, April 16, 2009 in New York City, from approximately 6:30pm to 9pm (or at least that’s when I left to go to work – half in the bag… Read full post »

APRIL 15, 2009 1:37PM

Pure Joy.

Pure joy.  I had to share it.  I'm teary-eyed.  Wish I was adept enough to link it to the word "joy".  

Reminds me of my favorite scene in "The Fisher King" - waltzing in Grand Central Station. 

Hell, why not add that Fisher King scene while I'm at it?… Read full post »

Editor’s Pick
MARCH 31, 2009 11:08AM

I'm Trying to Get This Fucking CD Open...

In keeping with my theme of not being able to understand anything anymore, like, your shower: (http://open.salon.com/blog/dcvdickens/2009/01/01/um_i_dont_know_how_to_operate_your_shower), my thong: (http://open.salon.com/blog/dcvdickens/2009/01/14/i_put_my_thong_on_sideways_again)), I explore the AmeRead full post »

Editor’s Pick
FEBRUARY 27, 2009 3:03PM

Casting Stones: Who Is to Blame For This Mess?

You read a lot about how stupid and greedy these people were who bought homes they couldn't afford with money they didn't have, resulting in bundles of "toxic" mortgages that, when they ballooned in cost, began the collapse of the house of cards it turns out the U.S.'s and in fact,Read full post »

FEBRUARY 19, 2009 3:08PM

Don't Make Me Name Just One!

I’m going to have cheat to be included in this “best movie” thread.  I just can’t do it without naming movies that I think were “best” for certain things they offered.

Best scary movie would have to be divided between sci-fi/supernatural and earthbound/ pRead full post »

In the light of Nadya Suleman's (The Octomom) delivery of 8 babies, with 6 others still at home, and the interesting support of her by many with conservative leanings, I offer this satire.  (Note: I originally wrote this soon after the babies were born.  Now, in 2012, Nadya is on public… Read full post »

JANUARY 28, 2009 1:39PM

My 25 (as assigned by O'Steph)

My 25 List:  (the hardest thing I think I’ve ever been “assigned”)


1.  I am completely turned off by photos of men in sleeveless T-shirts no matter how lovely their bodies are (the one exception being Marlon Brando).  On the other hand, a man in a uniform, an… Read full post »

Editor’s Pick
JANUARY 23, 2009 10:39AM

The Unbearable Stupidity of "Lost"


Well I watched the premiere Episode of “Lost” the other night and I am so glad: not only did they explain what's been going on but they’ve given us a taste of what's to come. 

In the next few episodes this is what will happen: 

The whole islandRead full post »

I recently went to see “The Curious Case of Benjamin Button”.  Not bad, but not memorable.  A little too saccharine for my tastes, but special effects were well done (although that’s really truly not what I want to care most about in a film). 


But throughout… Read full post »

I don't have anything to say and I'm on my way out the door, but I'm just yelling here on my own and had to join my voices with those in the crowds I'm watching on CNN.  Hooray!  Yes, America, you did it!  "A real sense of national pride!" (per reporters)… Read full post »

JANUARY 17, 2009 11:05AM

Job Listing. Must Have Own Sunscreen.



This one's for Mungular in particular, but for also for the rest of the writers here (that's everyone I suppose), employed or not. 

God don't you wish you could just disappear to a semi-tropical island, with or without your family or boyfriend/girlfriend (depending on the sRead full post »

JANUARY 14, 2009 4:11PM

I Put My Thong On Sideways... Again

A Thong  

You'd be surprised (or I suppose men would be surprised; not women who wear these things) how easy it is to do.  This happens to me fairly regularly, me with my undies on sideways, and sometimes I catch it before the jeans go on, and sometimes I 'm… Read full post »

Editor’s Pick
JANUARY 1, 2009 9:57PM

Um, I Don't Know How to Operate Your Shower...

      I'm one of those who travels for the holidays; not to anywhere particularly fascinating, but to the homes of friends and family who put me up in the spare bedroom, on the couch, or who kindly kick their small children to the floor so I have a place toRead full post »

DECEMBER 9, 2008 12:23AM

Just Say One Nice Thing

We’d all like to think we’re not cruel people. We give to charity, we hold doors for strangers, we think appropriately sad thoughts when we read sad things in the paper. But the truth is, we sometimes are, and the people to whom we are most often cruel are the ones withRead full post »