The Sandwich of Knowledge... Kind of like the obelisk in 2001.
One might ask, 'What are some of the signs of the coming apocalypse?'
...An economic meltdown unlike anything we've ever seen before?
A 10 storey asteroid coming within a smidgen of hitting us, as was the case on Monday Mar. 2/09.
All of these are quite valid and plausible contenders...
But no, the one I think that really puts the nail in civilization's cramped coffin would have to be the arrival of a three storey mega-sandwich heralded on a website with the rather straightforward descriptor, 'This is why you're fat'.
Yes ladies and gentlemen, I give you ''The Sandwich Of Knowledge'. Not even those whacky Romans had anything quite as over-the-top as this.
Any one of the four horsemen would be hard-pressed to heave this bad boy around.
This large, layered leviathan comes courtesy of a young man going by the rather diminutive name of 'Luke'. Whether he is real or imagined, I wonder if he realizes what he hath wrought.
The Sandwich Of Knowledge (TSoK) consists of a bottom tier containing eight strips of bacon, six pork sausages and four beef burger patties;-- followed by a second tier of black pudding; topped by a third tier comprised of two diced chicken breasts and six fried eggs.
Audacious in design and unrestrained in execution, it breaks all traditional meal boundary rules.
A melange of breakfast, lunch and dinner all rolled into one single, beastly creation.
It's like the Hadron Supercollider of Sandwiches!
Dare anyone actually consume the TSoK, he or she would gain 'Complete World Knowledge' and become either The Beast, the neighbour of The Beast or perhaps like that Jeopardy champion guy Ken Jennings... But probably a rather more insufferable version of him. Whoever or whatever that person would become, two things are certain. They would literally touch the face of God... And then immediately drop dead of a heart attack.
Bravo to the plucky soul who had a dream and made it a reality!
There are any number of worse ways to go out than at the hands of a killer sandwich!
- Steve Steinbach
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Bryan Harrison
Tytle Cymons
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Comments
How much does that thing cost???
The "sandwich" is disgusting.
The description of it alone may give me nightmares.
"Man vs. Food" show--are up to the challenge?
Why is my left arm tingling?
Where, pray tell, did you get that picture? Did you see this monstrous thing in the, uh, flesh and photograph it yourself? I'd take it home and dine on it for a week (including the blood pudding, which I used to like in my less queasy youth...)
anyway you get the gist - silly me
Speaking of "Man vs. Food"....I am not the scolding type...a bit of a hedonist, really, but Mon Dieu, that show makes me embarrassed to be an American.
"Look! We have so much food we use it for entertainment and amusing displays of gluttony!".........mmmmm....way to go, you image maker...waaaay to go.
Accidentally wiping ground black pepper onto my sweaty face during waitressing days, admittedly less spicy than the habanero sauce he was eating, was more than painful enough. As if biting my fingernails after dicing a jalepno if I didn't wash thoroughly enough.
I'll take one. And a Diet Coke, of course.
Although if it were 4am and i was really toasted, i might just order it.
Talk about not eating anything with a face, this bad boy (could be a girl) has three faces pig, cow, and chicken; and has to be the ultimate Vegan nightmare. And I thought the BBQ, bacon cheese burger with fried onion rings and blue cheese dressing was over the top. I stand corrected.
Question: Does the sandwich come with pot? I think you would have to be stoned and suffering from the worse case of munchies to even attempt it.
Should man have something so culinarily perfect? Should he dare to reach for such heights? Yes, if you finished it you may well see the face of God right after the ER doctor who tries to start your heart again calls your time of death.
I visualize Two, wandering arm and arm, singing a sacred concerto.
I will never eat a open-sandwich again with an insensitive attitudes.
(TSoK) Ya nots so sarcastic Ya make truth seekers (credo)` Shivers.
(sandwich of knowledge, apocalypse, O, Ya no sip Mountain Dews)?Follow thee Open Salon, Good sandwich Feed, get, scram, Ya hear?
okay. I slush up.
It's nice slushy.
Thank you for rescuing my Saturday nights from the Slough of Despond.