Divorce Bard's Blog

...Iambic pentameter is for the ear. Read it out loud.

Divorce Bard

Divorce Bard
Location
pretty how town, USA
Birthday
February 13
Bio
While the ashes of marriage #2 were cooling, I began a journal here in verse, to keep myself out of trouble. So far so good, and one day at a time. I took a hiatus this past January, and I missed it terribly. Writing daily had changed the way I think - not my opinions, but the process of thinking itself. So here I am back again, and hungry. I began with three rules: (1) Iambic pentameter, (2) Perfect rhyme, and (3) It had to be true (no hyperbole). I hereby amend rule number 3: If I'm writing about myself, yes, it has to be true. But it doesn't, if I want to tell a story.

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AUGUST 5, 2010 12:53AM

Creeped Out. Wednesday August 4, 2010

Rate: 13 Flag

I killed a really nasty looking bug.
I saw it and OH GOD OH ICK OH UGH
...For just a second, I was really skeeved.
I vacuumed it away.  I'm so relieved.
It had about a hundred thirty legs.
I hope it wasn't laying any eggs.

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Shel Silverstein, move over! DB is on the move! Cute, cute...:)
eww. I saw that one once in my barn....yuck.r
lol @ the second line. it's so real- the 'OH GOD OH ICK OH UGH' is written exactly as it would be uttered in exclamation.
I found this so amusing. I never trust anyone with more than 4 legs!
This made me smile. Bugs are all around me here.
I love how you can write a funny, love poem about this creature! rated.
My face just went into an involuntary smile..._r
Amusing poem, DB, but were you aware of a recent bulletin in Cosmic Sciences reporting that the planet Centitune has dispatched a diplomatic delegation into the s0lar system seeking to enhance peaceful notions in all life forms it encounters? The diplomats are said to be tiny by our proportions and to be many-legged. I just hope...
I can just picture it. Adorable and funny :-)
Laying eggs--what are the odds?
ICK DB hope it didn't leave little reminders..
They breed in vacuum cleaners, those ones.
Seriously ? I'd move.
bugs...*shudder*

and kim needs to hush! (brb,i have to go toss my vacuum cleaner in the trash)
OH GOD OH ICK OH UGH
Only you could get away with this, DB. I don't know how you do it day after day - I'm glad your getting more readers here!
cute, unless you're a bug! r
Hi everyone, I am working way too late again. Thank you all for coming by all day today. I was BEGINNING to think everyone was on vacation! What a relief to see you all.

Susan: um... he left us 11 years ago. He can't exactly move anymore?

hugs: yes indeed, yuck. Ultimately, there were 3 of them last night. I can handle snakes better than this particular buhuhuhuuuug.

Renatta: I missed you. I'm glad I hit the mark. I'll confess to having laughed out loud when I wrote it.

Kit: what an excellent rule. Although sometimes it's hard to trust anything with LESS than four legs, as well.

scupper: just so you know, I am not a scaredy-pants. It's just this one, really skeevy creature... blek.

Caroline: I had to. I got too serious the night before. Always happens.

Joan: that would mean you've been there, no?

Matt: uh-oh... Did you say they have diplomatic immunity? Or was that impunity?

Pavanne: sure, go ahead. It's easy to laugh when it's not in YOUR kitchen. Hardy har har.

Pilgrim: I'd say approximately 100%. I mean, what else would a bug be doing in August?

anna1: yes. My sentiments exactly. Couldn't have said it better.

rita: reminders... that is why I use the vacuum cleaner, and not a swatter. Ick. Really, ick.

Kim: are you sure? I just read about some acrylic paint made in Australia. I think they like the tint.

lorianne: old trick I learned when I had a dog. Vacuum up flea powder.

tril: yes, it was absolute poetic license.

maria: hey! Welcome! Come back! (fresh verse served daily!)

Thanks everyone. I gotta get to bed. You are all great.

'night.
For all of us who have squished an OH GOD OH ICK OH UGH before-- this is brilliant. I can feel the creepies crawling up my back and neck right now -- Well done, O Bard!