She always gets her promise out of me,
When lights are out, and I say go to sleep,
That I'll come back and check on her, to see
If she might still be up, awake, or deep
In dream. Five minutes please. I say okay.
And at the promised time, give her her due.
Most nights, her eyes are open. So I say
Goodnight, again, and I'll look in on you,
Five minutes more. Now close your eyes. Goodnight.
But sometimes I forget. Then five is ten.
Fifteen. And though I'm certain she's allright,
I check on her. I said I would. And then,
I wish she were awake. So I could say,
Hello. Goodnight. Again. Then end my day.
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Alysa Salzberg
Melissa Miles McCarter
Scarlett Sumac
jlsathre
Matt Paust
Jowita Bydlowska
Salon.com
Comments
Hello."
I'm so bad - my kids have learned to sleep through the slobbery kisses planted all over them while they sleep, b/c they are too irrisistable to me right before I go to sleep...
Another beautiful sonnet. Sigh....
The counting works. She knows that now.
Kim, you have daughters. That makes you a pushover.
Antoinette, I hope my kids get at least as you get here. When I write these, they are fast asleep, or with their mom. When they're awake and asking for a million things at once, well, you know.
anna1, you are very kind. And I do hope she feels safe. She had a rough patch, I think, when the separation was new. If I could, I would give her a new chrysalis to sleep in every single night.
Linnnn, thanks - I have heard this. And trust me, she's practicing for being a teenager. I am very curious, about how easily she'll be able to get to sleep. We'll see. She's getting closer to 13, one day at a time.
Y, mine sleep through my rubbing their head sometimes, just a little. I tell myself I'm checking their temperature.
pastvoices, yes exactly. That missed moment. It was getting harder to have missed it, because the kids' mother was coming back soon, after a week and a half away (they are with her now, which is why everyone is getting such full responses).
vanessa, I am certain that you do. The glimpses of your kids, that you've given us, have been delightful. You are lucky to have such beautiful eyes looking back at you.
Kate, thanks. I feel sometimes that I'm cheating a little, using sonnet form for a diary entry, really. There isn't a lot of imagery here, no colors, no sound, no smell. But I'm more and more drawn to the form, for its sheer rhetorical power. It is very satisfying.
catch, yes, she knows that counting works. And I remind her to do it. But she has been asking me to check on her in 5 minutes ever since she's been able to ask for anything at all. So now and then, if she's awake, she reports to me the number that she has counted down to.
rita, it breaks my heart just to hear you say that. But I take some consolation from your swimming poem, about holding on to your dad's shoulders in the water. It is still one of my favorites, and expresses such a self-confident love.
Thank you all for your patience, while I posted my nightly scribblings and maintained a careless silence. The kids are back with their mother tonight. You may hear from me a little more. (You are less expensive than the bar on the corner, that's for sure.)