My mom tried to friend me on Facebook. Seriously. I talk to her every day, there’s no need to “re-connect.” So I had to politely ask why she wanted to be my friend. She said it was the thing - she heard about it and wanted to try it. Together we decided we didn’t need to be Facebook friends.
But I have been friended by all sorts of people from high school, temple and camp. Its coming up on a big reunion for me this summer (and its not my ten years out of grad school) and people who I haven’t thought about in years are coming out of the woodwork.
High school is so so far away for me. I am very removed from all that. My parents divorced after my freshman year of college, and Mom moved to the city while dad kept the house. He rented out the rooms, so I rarely went back “home.” Meanwhile, I was exposed to all sorts of artists and intellectuals and all I wanted to do was move to the city and be one of them.
In my high school yearbook someone wrote, “Don’t change and become a Greenwich Village art freak” and yep, I did. Like most people I grew up and explored and became the unique person I am now, without looking back much.
My dad passed away in 2001 and I haven’t been back to Huntington since.
I am close friends with a few people, but none from high school. I met my oldest friend Todd freshman year in college, and made most of my friends at work and grad school. Yet now, all of a sudden, I am “speaking” on a daily basis with people from jr high! People who used to tease me in jr high. People who I played spin the bottle with.
A boy I loved more than thirty years ago is my friend again. Someone who apparently loved me in silence is my friend again. I was looking through someone’s photos, and thought, “her parents look pretty good.” Then I realized the lady with the grey hair is my friend from temple. Who I told what a french kiss was. Do I look that old? Am I that old?
Every day I tweet a piece of a song lyric, and for years most people at work can’t guess the song. But three friends from high school sure do - and I talk to them all the time now. (They say your music tastes are cemented in your teens - maybe this is an old wives tale, but these boys (men?) know all the same stuff that I do.)
I can’t find a few people I’d like to reconnect with. Joan Brophy - JB - where are you? Martha? Karen Block from camp - why did we all lose touch?
I’ve had some lovely long emails from people I had to look up in my yearbook. Sad to admit I don’t remember them at first. Its hard to think of these friends as they are now; its also hard not to look back with rose colored glasses. Reminiscing is fun for a bit, and its fun to talk with someone who knew me before all the stuff happened. But then life intrudes. I wonder how long we’ll all continue to speak to each other about our lives thirty years ago. I wonder who will really be a friend.