he's just not that into you
2009
"If a guy doesn't call you, he doesn't want to call you."
-Alex
Oh yes... the turmoil of dating. Well first of all.... thank goodness I am not in the dating pool. Second of all.. thank goodness I am not in the dating pool. Yes, I said it twice. Yes, I am talking out loud. I actually really liked this movie. It was so funny to be able to relate to something so many years out of the the dating game.
As a woman, once a girl, I did all the classic things this movie talks about. I over analyzed, over criticized and over thought every move my lust to be took. I followed it up with the daydreaming, the wondering, and of course the singing of songs with my name and his in one sentence. I even started to sign my name with his last name. Yes, many of you might relate.
However, this movie's title says it all.. yet, still over the years and through friendships and repeated first loves, girlfriends try to tell one another that he will call. When in actuality, if he wanted to call he probably would have already.
This movie had some big names in the cast. Ben Affleck, Jennifer Aniston, Scarlett Johannson, Ginnifer Goodwin, Bradley Cooper, Drew Barrymore and Jennifer Connelly. It was entertaining and of course easy to watch.
I came away with a thought after watching the movie. That the secret to dating for women is supposed to be a secret. True love is sometimes hidden. I've always thought the secret to seeing if a guy liked you was to pretend you weren't into them. Yet, in reality maybe that's what the problem. There is all these games.
Sometimes the hunt for Prince Charming is too tough to endure. Women, girls, and even their girlfriends tell one another that Prince Charming will come around. If not in this guy, maybe in the next. The secret to knowing true love or even knowing if the guy is into you may be just that... a SECRET and finding Prince Charming only happens in fairytales.
So as I watched this film, I laughed, I shook my head in agreement. I smirked and held back my tears as I knew I was a victim of these pathetic exercises of over-analysis and debate. But, to my dismay... we can only blame ourselves and yes, our girlfriends for encouraging us to be stalker-like and un-human in our attempt to gain approval and reciprocation in a guy.
Perhaps the reason guys are from Mars and women are from Venus is just that their is no other cosmic way to know if you are liked or loathed unless you give into the game. We are universally different.
My question to you... is love a game? Is it a "tag, you are it" sort of deal? Is it a "I ignored you for three days, now lets see if you will respond to my call?" Or is it simply "I'm not into you really, I just want to see if you think I am, because it feels great to be liked?"
Either way... dating is a mystery, love is an enigma... but, falling in love at a young age; well... its just indescribable. Having to re-fall into love... well that is another posting. Sometimes the hardest thing about falling in love is accepting rejection. The easiest thing about feeling love, leads to the hardest part about getting over it.
But, as you always hear.. its better to have loved then to have never loved. Even though the goal is getting that love to call you back ;-)
I have to say cheers to the dating scene.. I don't miss you, but boy was it fun.
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Comments
I wonder what you would say about Dancer in the Dark. ~Rated