Imagine you are a single something, male, female, doesn't really matter, and looking to connect out in the cold cruel world with other single somethings, where do you go?  Well, the logical answer might be a church group, or bar (if you're into bars), or friends, or the ubiquitous dating website. 

As a single something, I see the ads everwhere, come to Match.com, EHarmony.com, Chemistry.com, ursingleandyousuck.com, liarsanonymous.com.  Well, you get the idea.  So, I ventured to a couple of dating sites and tentatively put up a profile and a picture.  Yes, the picture is me, not some airbrushed bimbo, but I digress. 

I have written about other dating nightmares, but this one takes the cake.  Are you ready?  Really?

So, I get an email saying that someone has sent me a flirt.  Naturally, being a somewhat inquistive single something, I check it out.  It seems that a fellow named "caringman070" wanted to chat with me.  Again, after verifying that he seemed to be somewhat attractive, and being an inquistive single something, I replied. 

 I won't bore you with the email by email details of our weeklong correspondence.  Suffice it to say that by email 2, he was telling me that we would make a great loving couple and he wanted to be my hero.  Now, I may be an inquisitive single something, but I am also a cautious and wary one as well.  So I would try to ask pointed questions like, "wow, your syntax is really odd, are you sure you're from Minnesota? " or "Just why do you think we'll make a great couple since we have never really spoken in person??" You get the idea.

This is what I learned: 

He grew up in Russia.  Ok, could be, that would explain the odd syntax. 

His parents died 2 years ago in a car accident.  Sad, very sad.

He inherited a business from his parents

He would relocate to find love. 

We would make a great couple

Then came his business trip.......  He told me that he had to travel to Texas to get some product out of Customs.  He would be staying with a friend.  He showed my picture to his friend, with whom, he was now giddily planning our life together.  He wanted to keep writing. 

OK, all plausible, possible scenarios, except of course for the life planning after a week, but you get the idea. 

On Saturday, I receive this:

How are you doing? Thank you so much for your call yesterday. I am always very happy reading your messages. like i said in my previous message, I believe that we shall make a very good match and i believe that you are a very nice and caring woman and you have all i am searching for in  my dream woman. I want you to know that i am ready to be the man of your life, i am ready to be your hero. I  went to the sea-port this morning to get my goods and when i got there the customs informed me that my good has been placed on hold and will not be shipped to my store in Minnesota until i pay for the custom duty fees, they said the reason for this fee is because the goods are coming in from Asia and so due to their policy , i will have to pay $14,500 for the custom duty fees, I was so sad when i heard this, I have been trying my best to get the money since i cam back and all i have been able to get is $8,500, I called two of my friends in Minnesota and they were only able to send me $2800 so right now i have the total of $11,300 and when i explained to kelvin, he was able to loan me $1000 so right now i need about $1,700 to complete the money. I have been trying my best to see how to get the rest money but no luck.

I am really not happy right now and i am so worried because i invested so much to purchase the goods, the goods are worth $290,000 so i really do not want anything to go wrong, i need to pay for this duty fees so that they can ship my goods to my store, i have already contacted my back and declined giving me a loan since i took a loan from the recently when i wanted to purchase the goods.Honey i really do not want to buy you with my problems but its just that i am so confused right now and do not know what to do next. I will really appreciate it if you can loan me the $1700 left and i promise to pay you back in 3days time, i promise. I will really appreciate you help this time and i will really be happy to get the money paid. Please i want to say a very big sorry if i am bugging you with my problems , its just that i do not know what to do next.

I will be happy to hear from you

Hugs

Now, I have been in and out of work for the past 2 years, so I don't have this kind of disposable income sitting around me.  And, even if I did, would hesitate to lend it to a man I have emailed to for a week.  So, I replied: