Eljekar

Eljekar
Birthday
June 12
Bio
Born in The Netherlands. Living in Italy. Fascinated (and bewildered) by the melting pot of American people, who came as master from "old-Europe" (Rumsfeld) to become a slave of the American Dream "... transformed by the act of immigration into the victim of a demon that drove him away from his ancient home to this strange new land ..." (Joseph Papaleo)

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JUNE 3, 2012 8:36AM

something you can't understand ... and burglars fail to feel

Rate: 32 Flag


Yesterday I witnessed the robbery of my neighbor's house. I took my dog for a walk, passed the bend of the graveled road, and saw a car in front of his house, with a man standing next to it. I knew instantly: something is wrong.

When the man saw me coming, he gave a shout, he walked around the car, and opened the trunk lid completely. From the house came two other men. They jumped in the car and went away. The purpose of opening the trunk lid is clear I suppose: I couldn't see the license number.

There were still some 50 meters to go, but I was sure what to find - I have had the same experience some time ago. Indeed, an open door, a lot of things on the floor, clothes, bags and so on. A laptop on the stairs outside, probably forgotten when they hurried away.

It's the usual hit and run. You have a holiday house, most of the time the windows shuttered, the main door provided with an iron grating. But then you are there. They notice. And, when you go for a visit to one of those delightful hilltop towns, they come.

I left the place as it was, securing his laptop in my house and went to the village where his odd job man lives. When I came back with the man, the owner of the house, a German, had just returned, and tried to warn the police with "his" Italian - it didn't work. So, I took over and informed the carabinieri. They promised to come - which in Italy can work out to be a long term promise.

I had done my job - an easy job. I restored the computer,  gave the owner a pat on the back, promised him to return when the police was there, trying to comfort him with the fact that I had had the same experience, which was no comfort at all.
The man was outraged. Knowing the man had suffered a heart attack lately, I prayed another neighbor, who is very good in handling all kind of people, to go to the man:
» che posso fare, Leonardo, non parlo Tedesco  (what can I do)
» da’ un abbraccio (put an arm around his shoulder)
It didn’t' work either.

In its essence it's just two things: it's about money - sometimes a thing of personal value - which will be compensated for by the insurance company.
And then there's something which comes later: you know yourself intruded in your intimacy, which sometimes turns out to be traumatic ... I felt it again, the moment I saw the door opened, the clothes at the floor.

In the evening he and his wife came along to thank me, while I was having dinner with my German friend - which helped them to relax a bit, because now they could share it with a fellow countryman. I offered them a glass of wine, uttering the usual phrases: it was nothing, I did my duty ... that kind of stuff.

This morning they left early to return to Germany. When I went out with my dog I found at my garden gate a basket with bottles of wine, homemade. I wondered: who could have done that?
There was a note. It read: Grazie ancora una volta per la tua aiuto. Danke und bis bald.

Sometimes it is impossible to fathom the real impact of what you do.

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Comments

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Eljekar,there is still humanity inside humans and I see it every day.This was an excellent think to do,understanding the so sensitive "you know yourself intruded in your intimacy, which sometimes turns out to be traumatic..".I once lived in Athens and after leaving in a hurry we just closed the old door without locking.Never looking back cause we thought the door was closed.You know what...Our neighboor watched our house for 2 days and nights in a row,cause the door after all did not lock.And he found a way to tight it together-cause we had turned the key and the lock was out without having closed the door-and this is something a fellow man did...for us...Just like you...And this actions are a true hoρe!!Rated both on the action,the thinking and the sharing!!
Bravo! This touches on a very deep human truth. Thanks for writing about what matters!
How horrid this is to read about and see.
I am so glad you were there for the neighbor, and see that he appreciated what you did.
Eljekar...a house burglary is awful. You feel raped. The very fact that someone, uninvited, has riffed through your possessions, stolen and destroyed what had personal value is terrifying. I have had it happen. It happens now a lot in Florida. So much so, that I am thinking about selling my home there.

Your story was very well written. I was able to visualize...particularly since I saw the photos of your villa on your web site.

I learned that professionals will open the bottom drawers first. I never thought about the trunk.

That said, you were supportive and caring. This neighbor...who may not have understood your language, clearly understood your intention and was grateful.
My apartment in Manhattan was once robbed but I had hidden most of my valuables behind a large stack of lumber before leaving and they remained safe. Sometimes neighbors are helpful. Sometimes, not. I suspect my neighbor's teen age kids were the robbers.
In the aftermath when outrage and adrenalin have run their path, perspective returns and people regain their perspective.
I think burglars do know at some level that they are invading privacy when they intrude, invade, and violate someone's personal space and steal their possessions. They simply don't care because they are either amoral or desensitized. They make up a marginal population who shut out the dictates of conscience by which the majority of decent people live.

Losing one's earthly possessions through theft is a big blow, but the knowledge that one's life and private space have been intruded upon so haphazardly by total strangers has a much longer lasting and traumatizing effect.

R♥
Your presence halted something that might have been much worse. You touched your neighbor in ways he cannot express now but will no doubt do so in the future. You have made connections now that will forever hold you in good stead. Great story.
Offering a shoulder, someplace to relax and relate, much bigger things than will ever be known.
you did well ... offering support and interaction post criminal activity displays one of the better traits of humanity. how many would not have gotten involved?
Rated for being a good neighbor ~
I fully believe in this world that this is the main event for we humans: do we secure the neighbor's belongings for them when they've been robbed, offer an arm or a wave hello -- or do we close off ourselves and feel nothing for our fellow man.
This also happens here a lot, where there are many vacation homes, cabins by a lake -- except here folks leave all their belongings in the vacation home then leave for months at a time, having other belongings in the next home, I guess.
Thieves can hardly believe how easy it is, and there is no human around to notice, or to console, for they are gone too. I don't think that is how communities thrive...
Yes, you never know how you'll touch others' lives Eljekar. It's a theme from It's a Wonderful Life that I've long appreciated. The break-in also touches a nerve. I've only been victimized once. It was on a small scale but still left me feeling unsettled for a few weeks and prompted me to but a much better lock.
Eljekar, I've read your bio several times now...have you spent much time here in America? I find it funny this quote assumes so much, as if all Americans are some slave to a dream...or that one was ever master in 'old-Europe' if they were driven away, assuming all were driven....although I could see how one might assume if one looked only on the surface in certain areas here.
Just curious.
I wish we had a neighbor as caring and kind as you.
Ande is right. We have friends thinking of moving to some REALLY out of the way place in Arkansas. The crime rate has traditionally hovered around zero there, but in the last three years robberies have soared right along with unemployment. Even we, who have never done this before, lock our doors when we leave the house.
Well done, L. This is what we are getting at when we speak of religion, God, duties.
God may be out there, waiting for our refined brains to understand.
But if there is a god, then he doesn’t only want us to figure him out, as we will, but also help our fellow creatures, which you did, and will be rewarded for, somehow.

Karma runs the universe,alongside evolution. They are intimately connected. To evolve is to “develop something gradually into something more advanced….”

Evolution is currently not making many changes in our physical being ..but in our mental and emotional being it is rumbling along….

it was nothing! you did do your duty
but to whom,what, where?
Thanks for counterbalancing the bad in the world with your deeds and words!
Things can always be replaced or forgotten, but acts of humanity have no measure and will always be remembered; even a simple pat on the back and the presence of kindness when someone is in need is the best remedy for just about anything.

You did good; real good.
I am glad you stopped them from getting away with the computer and agree completely thieves don't understand, they think it is there's since you have it but when they are robbed they pitch a huge fit as in how could anyone do that to them!
Thanks all of you, for coming to my place and paying attention.
I appreciate that.

I didn't tell this to display my "heroic" behavior - there was nothing heroic.

I didn't tell this story to complain burglary, or to call for neighborhood watch groups.
I don't like complaining, and I don't like the real effects of watch groups.

Normally I don't like telling personal stories in public space.

But here two questions raised:

- do burglars really not understand what they are doing - we know of the vendetta's between feuding criminal groups, because of honor, or something like that.

- how about my emotional involvement - I noticed that I was very upset, because of my own experiences

That's what I wanted to tell.
Jan, yes, I have also suspects in mind - regarding my house and regarding my neighbor's house. But, lacking any indication, leave alone evidence, it's a bit discriminating, isn't it. So I decided not to listen to that voice.
Just Thinking, as a matter of fact I was never in USA. I was in Canada (holiday, a very fine place) and in Brazil (work). But I have met a lot of your people outside USA, I read USA-writers and I think I see more news from inside USA than from inside Italy or the Netherlands - don't ask me why.

I'm, as I say in my bio, really fascinated.
Most of your people I know are so Okay. And the picture you're constant building up to destroy that image, with your collateral damage - and for sure hey, we don't build that image ourselves.

How about?
I don't know.
Do you?
Sometimes burglars don't understand the full impact of their deeds because they've never had personal space of their own that seemed in any way special or sacred. But more often, they just don't care, or they feel somehow entitled because they believe they've been wrongly deprived of that sort of space or luxury.

As for your deed, it was a good one. Heroic or not, it was the right thing to do and had more of an impact than you might have predicted. Good deeds, even simple ones, often do.

Nice piece.
People, like any other living organism, do what they can and feel they must do to survive. That includes decent empathic people, thieves, murderers, nasty kid, vicious dictators and presidents, lions, paramecia, bedbugs, and traffic cops. We each have to cope as well as we can. And we are not all alike in our feelings towards each other.
What lovely people they were and so wonderful to be appreciated for what you so lovingly did for them.
rated with love
A butterfly flaps it's wings in Brazil and up comes a typhoon in the South Pacific. Chaos Theory in a nutshell. We bounce and collide off others, even when we never physically meet. The ripple effects of our actions proceed outward, irrespective of our intent.

People who take from others always leave a ripple of negative energy. It's physical from the tangible losses. It's emotional and psychological from the invasion -- a terrible looming truth that we daily push back from our perceptive awareness -- security is an illusion. Nothing and no-place is truly safe.

If we focus on that, it can drive a sane person mad. We have to erect these barriers to reality so that we can continue to go to sleep, eat in relative peace, and reduce our overall stress. IN so doing, however, the more we engage in this negation of the reality of our true situations, the more inclined we become to inattentiveness. We lose touch with our senses and knowings that belie everyday awareness.

I personally take stock of my situation, knowing the illusory content of this reality -- self created from years of social and genetic programming -- and allow myself to keep the curtains in place as long as they are required, in order to get rest, destress and relax.

Like all other species, I do my best to stay attuned to my surroundings and only really worry about the things I might be able to do something about. It isn't that much, really.

So glad you posted this and don't forget -- your ripples brought you, ultimately more goodwill and a basket of handmade wine.

--r--
You did what you were supposed to do; that's what matters. A well-written post. R
I have nosy neighbors. Often I don't lock my doors. Sometimes I even forget to close them before I go to bed, leaving just a flimsy screen between me and the street. Good neighbors are a good thing. I'm trying to remember about the doors but so far so good.
A good act, a good description. Worth reading.