Why do we Tweet/Twitter?

I really don't undersand it.  I'm 29, I know I'm getting up there in years but I'd like to think I'm still young, at heart, if not in body.  I still read comic books, I go on nostolgia kicks with cartoons from my youth such as Voltron and G.I. Joe.  I try to keep up with new music and fads and pay attention to what the youngsters are doing, I try to keep myself young.  But for the life of me I cannot understand this whole Twitter craze.

Our culture has already been reduced to out-of-context soundbites, blogs, crawlers during news shows, and spoilers for folks who can't wait for their favorite TV shows or movies to surprise them.  American Idol and other reality shows give us a false appearence of having insight into others' lives without the benefit of actually getting to know the people they focus on, prefering instead to cut to the "best parts" of the peoples lives which are being exploited.

Even a resource such as Wikipedia, which should be an excellent source of encyclopedic information, is subject to trollers changing particulars about well-known or not-so-well-known figures and events.

We are beset on all sides of us in this "information age" by false advertising, false truths and false leaders who use the digital age to twist information and facts to their own ends and purposes.

So why do we Tweet?  Look at what Tweeting has gotten us so far:

The Republicans in the legislative branch didn't have the respect or decency to listen to Obama's first Address to the Union earlier this year; they decided instead to Twitter about it and other less consequential things;

Accidents caused by people Tweeting and texting while driving have gone up in the last few years;

Instances of school bullying over the net - specifically on sites like Twitter or FML.com - have been on the rise recently;

Generally wasting time and loss of productivity has been aided by Twitter and similar sites.

Yes, Tweets have allowed us insight into on-the-ground action during the election and subsequent protests in Iran these last few weeks.  But that is one useful instance among millions of basically useless "Hi"'s and "Bye"'s, many of which are aired happily by CNN and other 24-hour news channels that need something to fill the time.

And what's the point anyway?  You make a post on Twitter and 20 seconds later it's already moved off the first page.  Half the time, a Tweet's intended target never even sees it.

I don't even know how to Twitter, if I wanted to, which I don't.  I have a good enough time talking to my girlfriend on a good old-fashioned IM or calling my mother on - gasp - an old-fashioned phone that you have to hold up to your ear and everything.

WALL-E's hermetically sealed environments and floating chairs with computers to hold one's attention all day doesn't seem all that far off.  I hope we never get there.