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Erica K

Erica K
New Jersey, USA
September 26
I have a new blog: Grew up in Jackson Heights, New York, but now live in Jersey. Married and the proud owner (servant?) of 4 cats, including a little blind guy named Quincy. Jobs have included: English teacher in U.S. and abroad, cabaret performer and member of a NYC sketch comedy troupe; now a legal secretary and freelance writer. Other jobs: canvasser for NYPIRG/cannery worker in Naknek, Alaska (a fisherman told me it was "the ugliest part of Alaska")/dog kennel cleaner/member of the swine and poultry crew on a California farm. "Ever tried. Ever failed. No matter. Try again. Fail again. Fail better." Samuel Beckett


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SEPTEMBER 12, 2011 5:37PM

Mom ♥ Sex and the City

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A year or two ago, I discovered something new and surprising about my mom: she loves Sex and the City.  It’s shocking because she is a devout Catholic who never dated after the divorce or re-married, and perpetually complains about TV shows with too much sex and violence, although she also raved about Death Wish when she watched it on the ION channel this spring.  Weird.   

When the resident coordinator at her former apartment complex heard about how enamored she was of the film, she said, “I’m gonna look out for you.” 

Suddenly I envisioned mom packing heat, a female Charles Bronson fighting crime in the mean streets of Manhattan.    

Now back to Sex and the City.  One night I was getting ready to leave mom’s apartment and asked what she was going to watch after I left and she mentioned Masterpiece Theatre followed by Sex and the City.  My mouth almost dropped open. 

“It’s on Channel 11,” she said.  “I don’t have anything in common with those girls; I just like them.” 

When mom was at our house on Easter weekend, we watched the first Sex and the City movie.  It was at this time I saw the full extent of mom’s devotion for the ladies.  She was riveted throughout the entire film.  This, you must understand, is rare.  She generally gets agitated during most TV programs or films due to her illness, and continuously asks or demands that I switch the channel.  She can sit through Scrooge, Casablanca, How Green Was My Valley and other classics on the Turner Classic Movie channel, but not through most “modern” fare. 

I was almost blushing during the scene in the film when Samantha places sushi all over her naked body as a Valentine’s Day surprise for her beau Smith.  Mom, on the other hand, thought this was hilarious. 

“That Samantha, she’s so funny,” mom said. 

Again, I thought to myself, what? 

Mom is full of surprises.  Is it the Alzheimer’s that’s made her less inhibited about sexuality or is this a side of her I never saw?  Either way, it’s been fun to watch. 

mom on ladder 

Mom painting at theatre (she was a member of the Milwaukee Repertory), June 1954, age 24. 
She could have been a 1950s "Sex and the City" girl.

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Charming story, and bittersweet. And she certainly could have been a SATC girl, from that photo!
Loved this story (and especially another photo from her Milwaukee days; I think I told you I'm a native).

Maybe your mother has a thing for shoes? One never knows.

In any case, happy there is something amusing that amuses her well enough.

Thanks for the post.
Wonderful story. That photo reminds me of a scene from the movie Dirty Dancing. I bet your mom would like that too.
I like the SATC girls too. There is something about the friendship that is enduring. The sex is secondary. It is all good. Great that your mom finds it enjoyable. Im happy for her.
Ha! What a sweet and fun piece. Kudos to Mom! R
It's the bond between the four women that makes the show work for me. I found this piece to be quite touching. Well done.
Alzheimer's does bring out some interesting things, doesn't it? How funny your Mom likes Sex and the City, a show which I've never understood other's appeal for, and I guess she wouldn't have either...before.
My mother in law forgot all her food issues, and her controlling issues, at a certain point in her Alzheimer's journey.
When we last saw her, her formerly tightly permed hair was loose and flowing, she was like a happy person for once. It was a lovely silver lining to an awful disease, for my husband....unfortunately, Alzheimer's doesn't just stay at this point where our narrow judgments or opinions are forgotten....
Sarah, I agree, that's why I like the show as well.

Just Thinking, Exactly. Alzheimer's has also, for lack of a better word right now, "softened" my mother. She is much more grateful and loving and eats things she never ate before, and loves everything I bring her (clothes, food, etc.). Thanks for reading.
I'm with Sarah, it's the friendship between the women that is the focus for me, how "there" they are for each other. Great piece, Erica, thank you for sharing it with us.
I'm glad there are plus's for your mother's illness. I know that the medication has sexual side effects that can be quite distressing in some elderly. My aunt became quite coy & flirtacious, while my father became convinced that my 80-year-old mother was letting in a boyfriend through the back reality she had NEVER given him or anyone else a moments question on her fidelity. Liking Sex in the City? Not bad. Excellent story.