Silly Bandz: A Sonnet

In the old age bracelets were not plastic crap,
Or if they were, they came not in such stupid shapes:
But now have Bandz caught parents in a buying trap,
And jewelry’s been slandered with consumer rape,
For since each hand hath put on Bandz's power,
Fouling the fair at a trendy, stretchy pace,
Sweet beauty hath no name no holy bower,
But is profaned, if not lives in disgrace.
Therefore the children' eyes are raven black,
Zombie-like, product driven, and they soulless seem,
As they search for animals and colors they lack,
Slandering creation with a false esteem,
Yet are they so becoming in their hot pursuit
Beshrew me: Now I think Bandz kind of cute.