First came the mother,whose parenting skills will forever be in question.
Then, came the accused murderess, who took the stand for what seemed like a good few years. She lied lots and cried some. She remembered a lot but forgot the twenty nine stabs and the gun shot. She made the cardinal mistake of not realizing that you have to put a camera in the dryer, and not just the wash. Duh.
She arranged her bangs, strategically. A guilty woman doesn't style three bangs just so!
A judge, of course, had to be apointed to preside ... and preside... and preside... and pr....This judge, Sherry Stevens, gives wide berth--relevancy be damned, sidebars galore. She has heard way too much about the ins and outs of anal sex. Pun not intended, but welcome nonetheless.
The state wasn't impressed with what Jodi thought to be a perfect murder, and a vertically challenged(Jodi's take from twitter by third party) prosecutor, Juan Martinez is poised, for even more protracted cross examination. The specter of these two's acquittals often made him cranky.
The same old state, Arizona, appointed, Jodi Arias, a defense attorney, Kirk Nurmi. The name Nurmi fits, but his suits sure didn't.
Televised Death penalty cases are busy making, so more counsel in the form of Jennifer Wilmott was appointed. Similar hair style to Jodi, but very different straits. Snarky facebook persons spotted a bald spot atop the head of Ms. Wilmot.
You see, Gloria Allred was too busy ensuring the civil rights of celebrity mistresses to offer her services.
What's the point of a fiasco of a spectacle, without a beady eyed charlatan to rack up costs, and send presents to the accused?Enter Dr. Samuels, and his bag of gifts for defendants.. 250 an hour has added up, as the Alexander family bastes in the misery unique to the injustice system!
Jen is concerned since the good doctor has seemed to inspire animosity from the jurors. Experts who know how to pretend to be scientific, cost 400 hundred an hour.
To the rescue is Alyce " No PHD for me," LaViolete. Nasty texts equal extreme battery to this batty Alice with a Y instead of an I. On the backs of the truly battered, The buck toothed, Alyce, testifies for six figures
And what would a grotesque charade be without Jodi's ex cellmate, Donovon? They bonded over commissary. Don't ask me how I know.
Once sprung free, convicted arsonist, Donovon Bering, is there in court, to support her former bunky(prisonspeak for one who you are locked up with, in a place as big as a small bathroom.)
It sure beats being under the throes of the Sherrif Arpaio.
And, there to watch every minute will be Dr. Drew, and Nancy Grace. Grace - free Nancy will again make mock of her last name as she expresses bloodlust in the guise of a concern for justice. She often grew testy with Jean Casarez Aka Jinkasourus
for exhibiting even handedness.
The non- soft spoken, Jane Velez Mitchell,
is on looky loo duty. strange fifteen minute famers, Katie Wick and Cane Lady, supply her with free commentary oustide the Maricopa county
One percenters extraordinaire, Mitt and Anne, didn't miss a moment.