My Daughter Had Her Own Governor Brownback (update)
By now, you've heard the story of the high school student who is being harassed by Governor Brownback to apologize to him for disparaging him in a tweet.
Other than the obvious problem of a grown man, a politican, being upset with a high school student because she said something mean about him, the questions of the power of adults over teenagers is not one to be brushed aside lightly.
I know.
A few years ago, my daughter encountered her own Governor Brownback in the guise of a middle school principal. While Twitter did not exist at the time, I have no doubt he would have carried the campaign further if he could have found a way to get away with it.
Here is that story:
When S. was 12, she and a group of her schoolmates made a decision that they were not going to stand for the Pledge of Allegiance, as is mandatory at their school every morning. The reasons for their decision will become clear as the story goes on.
I knew nothing about this. S. knows my political views, but I don't preach. So, imagine my surprise when I'm driving home with S. from school and the following conversation takes place.
"Mom. I have to tell you something."
Me, arching eyebrow.
"Yeah. I wrote a letter to the principal today."
"Oh?"
"I think I might get in trouble, so I thought you might want to know."
At which point she reads me the following. I'm sharing it with you because I took that letter out today, this day when a Kansas governor has gone mad, and I found myself wondering, what would happen if we raised an entire generation of kids that were willing to question authority and ask important questions? Could we avoid the next war? The next financial collapse? It's my hope.
So here, without further ado, and with all the 12-year old grammar and spelling intact (and, I must admit, a bit of flinch-worthy language), I give you the letter.
Dear Mr.
I have different beliefs about our country than you do but that's not the reason I am writing you this letter. I would like to point out a few things to you.
You said that our country had so much liberty, that kids can get breakfast at our school for free. But why can't they have it in the first place? The very government you're pledging allegiance to! Over 20% of our country is in a state of poverty becuase their jobs don't supply healthcare or there is not enough money because of the tax cuts for the rich to even SUPPORT a medicare system.
I am very sorry that your friend died in Vietnam, but this was unprofessional of you to bring that up. I am also going to point out that the people who issued that draft, was the government. The great, tremendous and free government.
I am a Unitarian Universalist. I do not believe in god so I found it DEEPLY offensive when you said this nation blessed by god. Okay how do you even know that there is a god? Does she/he speak to you? I believe that god would want to bless other countries besides the US that have taken better care of the beautiful creature that she/he created (planet Earth).
I know that you have the freedom of speech and to say the Pledge if you want to, as I have to right to write this letter to you. Guaranteed to us by the 1st amendment.
People in our school stood up for what they believed in. They used their BRAINS. They thought and discovered political opinions. You as a principal should be supporting our learning. Instead, you CRUSHED it by pulling at our American heartstrings with your speech.
Overall, I found your speech a cry for pity, one-sided, and against our religious freedoms.
Sincerely,
The principal's response to this letter? He went to my daughter's basketball coach and tried to get her kicked off the team. When that failed, he stopped. But he never spoke to my daughter about her concerns, just regarded her as a troublemaker for the last couple years she spent at her middle school.
So, I say to Emma: "rock on."
And to S., I say. "You make me proud each and every day. I love you."
(S. in 2010 in India, where she was part of a learning/service community. Among her experiences was working in Mother Teresa's hospice, and teaching girls in northern India.)
Update: The governor has apologized, although he blames it on his staff.
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Comments
I cannot wait until my daughter is free of this scene and in college where her thoughts and views are respected.
I remember feeling torn over this incident. I've taught my kids to be independent, and I do feel that as a 12-year old, she may have been rude. But I figured he was the adult, and he should have dealt with it in an adult way.
The fact that he chose to try to humiliate the kids in front of the whole school, instead of meeting with them to find out what they were thinking and why they had reached their decisions, seemed to be me to be a major failure of a teaching moment.
Yes. You're right. It's much easier in college to "be yourself."
Still, I am forever astonished at how local issues and narrow interests can come together to form a broader dialogue and reach critical mass. It's a brew and despite our instant communication technology, it evolves on it's own timetable, burns itself down to an irreducible core that cannot be divided and conquered. The process is so painstaking that many times it surprises us when we finally acknowledge it. Decades can go by and generations are lost before it manifests.
My best hope is that the next generation can find the right balance.
And good for your daughter - amazing document from a 12-year-old. Who has obviously gone on to do more good things.
And Linnn's right, tho having done what I am able at jr and at hi sch levels as teacher and head of division, I can say w.o much question that hs is usually easier for kids bc thre individuality is prized by more than just a bullied and/or disaffected handfull (as in jr ji).
Rated.
You have a right to be proud, Lorraine.
Proud of your daughter for writing such a fine letter. It becomes clearer as time goes on how often the position of coach or principle is held by a bully, and perhaps we know why bullies aren't dealt with so well in school- they are just in job training.
You are a strong, level headed person with a lot of empathy. You're a good example for me. Thank you.
I have seen my children at the threshold many times, I have seen them find something within to fight wrongs with. I, like you, am appreciative, sometimes amazed and mostly proud of what they do and where it takes them. It comes, I think from raising them with the a strong dose of reality, individualism, support and allowing individualism. The years in this town have never been easy, from my politics and activism to my abhorrence of mystical, negative group think. All I can say is, you have done well.
R
It's funny. As soon as I heard about the Kansas case, I immediately thought of my daughter. My bet is that there are cases of this every day, where a teenager voices an opinion not in line with the official story and is asked to apologize.
Good job. "S"
Proud of you both!
My daughter refused to stand for the Pledge and when the teacher confronted her she boldly stated that she was not a citizen and felt that it was not her duty to do so. She was about 8 at the time! (We are now citizens but she had already finished high school by the time we got all the paperwork squared away)
So a high school principal telling students this is the freest country in the world while simultaneously taking steps to restrict their freedom is merely demonstrating the beginning point of the continuum of the iron fist in the velvet glove!