Several months ago, Fred began to slow down more than usual.  He lay stretched out on the carpet, barely lifting his head.  Rico; The Neurotic Cat,  periodically nudged him to make sure that he was still breathing.  He remained motionless, ignored me and more ominously, showed no interest in his food dish.  His sluggishness was worrying for everyone. 

I considered my options; Fred was an older cat and I had experiences with aged cats who needed to be put down.  Years ago, I had to release a 16 year old cat that had lost control of all of her bodily functions.   The vet said Juliette was old and dying and that it was time.

The best thing that I could do for Fred was to prepare for the worst.  My son-in-law is a vet technician and so I asked my daughter if I could get a family rate for an euthanasia session.   She was horrified and refused to ask.  She  believed that I was looking for an acceptable excuse to rid myself of my most insolent cat.  It was a realistic query.  If Fred was going into the Great Void, he did not deserve to suffer along his journey.  After years of being a good and  vocal cat, he was entitled to a pain free exit.  I would only exercise the final option when his quality of life had deteriorated to the point of constant pain and discomfort.  

Yes, Fred could be disagreeable.  He has the most irritating habits of my three cats.  He scratched my bedroom furniture but not my couch.  He woke me at the crack of dawn to have his ears rubbed.  When it rained he refused to come inside. He would stay under the pine tree until I went out and picked him up and carried him in.  Then he would wait until I dried him with a towel and of course filled his bowl with fresh food. In spite of his faults, he was still a good cat. 

So, I waited and watched.  Fred began to perk up.  He showed interest in his food dish. He smacked Rico The Neurotic Cat when he came to close.  I felt his  breath on my neck in the morning.  I heard my bureau being shredded into splinters again. Fred was back to normal. 

He will get sick again.  He will die soon.  He is 12 years old which is old for a farm cat.  But for now, I think that he was testing me;  trying to see what I would do when he starts to fail.  I did not immediately get out my shovel and start digging a grave in my backyard.  I considered my options and I  knew that Fred deserved death with dignity.   

Fred is stretched right now by the china cabinet.  Rico The Neurotic Cat is nearby keeping an eye on him.  I may come home one day and Fred will be dead.  For now, he has postponed his exit and I believe that he knows that when the time comes, he can trust me to do the right thing.