The mark of a good man is one who stays, for better or worse, even without that piece of paper. " I'm not going anywhere " he would tell me.
"You can throw me your worst" he said, and I did.
"I'm not leaving you" ,"No matter what ". and he didn't.
I was miserable to be with in those dark times. Even I could not stand myself. I was so pissed off and defeated it made my skin crawl. No one would have faulted him for bolting from that no end in sight situation.
He stayed and he stayed steadfast as he picked up his crumbling fiance,a mere shell of her former self, and held her tight and reminded her how strong her inner self was . Right now her inner strength was having a feast at her expense and that needed to reverse.I did reverse that trend with the help of paxil and neverending love.
I share, going on twelve years with my partner( living with a partner)(that's the box I get to fill out on forms) an amazing love.
He gives me flowers and chocolate when I least expect it and need it most.
Our foundation , our commitment to this relationship is never questioned or brought into our fights even when I know I have gone to far by the peel of the get away car out the driveway. He returns , I apologize and we fall into love again.
The universe sent my love to me twice . We met in Amsterdam, where I worked in a guest house called the "Get Lucky". I was reading a thin paperback called Urban Shamanism which contained an African version of the I Ching. I ask my question " Where any of the men I dated my soulmates?" I threw my coins."Negative" came back the answer.
Just then , in universe time, my future fiance walked past and chirped a cheery "Hello" and I threw my coins and asked " What about him?
SUCCESS. Came the symbol.
With that , I ripped out the page ,stuck it in my back pocket and said to myself, "Let's go meet the boy." And the rest, so they say is history: Ours.