blog of a classless curmudgeon

Gordon Hilgers

Gordon Hilgers
Dallas, Texas, United States
July 22
Born in Denver, Colorado, 1950s-era capitol of the Beat scene, Gordon Hilgers was exiled to Dallas, Texas, in 1963, and Dallasites were so angry that another 9-year-old Democrat had entered the city that they killed Kennedy. From there, Gordon began writing poems and stories, eventually received a BA degree in newswriting, has written for The Dallas Morning News, despite the fact he was far too Liberal for the likes of William F. Murchison and John Birch, worked as an advocacy journalist and is partly responsible for the City of Dallas' public homeless shelter--where poor people can go to find jobs rather than getting told that because they've forgotten to embrace Jesus that God made them homeless.

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JANUARY 8, 2013 11:41AM


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I’ve got a few questions about the plethora of Jewish neoconservatives dog-piling onto Chuck Hagel at the very instant Obama nominates him for the important Secretary of Defense position in the United States government. 

First, was I asleep when Israel annexed the entire United States?  The reason I’m asking this is because Jewish neocons are everywhere expressing dismay that Hagel had the cojones to speak his blunt opinion about U.S. relations with Israel.  I just can’t help but wonder: Is the United States now part of Israel? 

We’ve already been through the outlaw presidency called Bush/Cheney when America eagerly filled the position of “Giant Robot for Israel” in a way that killed hundreds of thousands of innocent Iraqi citizens and turned the entire area into a bloody, chaotic warzone, and a lot of this was predicated by our apparent state of beholden ardor for our Israeli masters.  This is puzzling to me.  When did Israel take over the United States?  Should I start wearing a yamaka?

Sunday on “Meet the Press”, the Bush Administration’s resident idiot-head, Dan Senor, got quite snippy regarding Hagel’s apparently refusal to be obedient to the Israeli overlords of America, and I couldn’t help but laugh. 

Perhaps to placate the Jewish hegemony over U.S. foreign policy, we should officially refer to President Obama as President Obamawitz.  Perhaps the President should begin appearances wearing the yamaka. 

The Israeli takeover of the U.S. was one of lighting-like efficiency.  Many Americans do not realize they are now Jews. 

America, territory of Israel. 

I’m not hankering for a drubbing from Jews over this takeover.  Doubtless ardent American Jews are going to consider this little snipe of mine as “anti-semetic” and will dismiss me as being “anti-Israel”.  The truth is, I don’t really care if I’m drubbed, shamed, guilted and dismissed.  I have my own problems with how Israel has been conducting itself in regard to the Palestinians they chased out of their homes. 

We’ve gone to war twice in part to protect the distinctly unholy “Holy Land”, and yet nothing has changed.  Rockets are flying into Israel from Gaza, and Israel is responding by bombing the hell out of Gaza.  Like many Americans who haven’t bit on the fundamentalist Christian viewpoint that Israel is where Jesus is coming back, I have distinct reservations against suddenly being an Israeli citizen. 

It is in this spirit, that I hereby nominate Benjamin Netanyahu as U. S. Secretary of Defense.  Netanyahu has shown he’s not willing to listen to plain old reason in terms of dealing with Palestinian claims, and that’s exactly what we need here.  We can gear the entire military might of the U.S. towards protecting Israel, go to war with Iran over protecting Israel, bomb Syria to protect Israel, and Israel, Israel, Israel. 

After all, William Kristol, a Jewish citizen, expects nothing less.  Dan Senor, the architect of a lot of the smarmy policies of the Bush/Cheney outlaw presidential administration, also expects us to find a candidate for Secretary of Defense who is “distinctly Israeli” in orientation. 

I will miss celebrating Christmas, and I am going to have to brush-up on Hanukkah rituals.  But now that I am an Israeli citizen, I suppose I’m going to have to invest in some books to help me become more Israeli.   

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You sir, have a fine sense of irony indeed!

Your suggestion is a "modest proposal" worthy of Swift. Perhaps, however, Kristol et al. should simply appoint Netanyahu as king of America and eliminate the middleman, a.k.a. Obama.