Highlights from this week's schedule
on the all new HAXXXION Channel
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Friday, 8 PM:
World Premiere STC Movie:
Open Fire III: Assassination Christmas
This time Hank Harder (Gordon Rock) must face down terrorists who seize his grandmother's house and hold his extended family hostage until he turns over the plans for the Army's new Atomic Sleigh. Instead, Harder delivers a little Noel Hell! Brand new weapons, brand new villains (Anthony LaPaglia, Tony Bennett)
"Harder's chestnuts are on fire...in this 3rd outing in the series"
-- CableMovieListings.com
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Wednesday, 4 PM
Hot Kiss from a Wet Fist
HAXXXION's biggest hit and cable's number one* Reality show!
First they fight -- no rules! then they make up -- no limits!
And you** get to decide which couple stays together
-- and which couples undergo the Trial of Separation Watersports Decathalon!
* late afternoon 18-25 low- to middle-income midwest/southeastern states
** $3.50 per vote call, not legal in MA, WY, and AL
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Saturday, 9 AM
Spit, the Wonder Dog!
Follow the zany manga-mania antics of Spit and his pack o pals (Zazu, Clong and Rhumba) as they defend the universe!
Satellite viewers with WIIs can control the action with interactive Zap collars!*
In 3D.
* Electrified collars and remote zappers sold separately. Some restrictions apply. Not recommended for children under 16.
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Saturday, Midnight
Cloak of Mystery Theater
Who done it? Why did they do it? What do they possibly gain by doing it? Where does it happen? How does it go? Who cleans up after?
The new series that lets you the viewer explain everything.
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Monday- Friday, 6 pm
Far-Out Far-Right News
Exclusive reports about things you just can't believe. But: you will!
(NOTE: Some regions have Baby Jesus Tears of Victory Crusade Hour of Eternal Power in this time slot; check your local listing)
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Seer
daisyjane
The Good Daughter
Chicken Mãâàn
the traveler
Ashley F. Miller
Salon.com
Comments
-rated-
I'm afraid it's hilarious.
And it IS great how much open call variety there is on OS!
hehehehe! excellent...love it. Thanks.
Pretty damn funny. As well as creative.
Expect a call from HAXXXION soon - you may be in the running for traffic mananger.
Rated.
p.s. take more meds. write more humor. we need laughs. ;
Greg - too funny. Con had better watch out. R
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