In honor of Mitt "Wayback Machine" Romney and his declaration that he "retroactively retired" from Bain (this), a contest.
What would you declare untrue, re-do, or re-construe, if you had Mitt's magic slate?
The winner gets the By Willard Power Alone Temerity Certificate, along with the virtual faux-golden stauette, The Bainless Tool.
"I'll retroactively buy Apple at $8 a share, study hard and become an astronaut, and get a picture of me and Harryhausen when he hung out with us cell painters that time in the 70s."
"I retroactively correct every typo, every awkward phrase, every over-wrought passage, every near-miss line, and polish all my writing to my current--no, NEXT year's ability!"
"I retroactively make out at the drive-in all night with volcanic voluptuary and best actress ever Anna Magnani, she falls passionately in love with me as a result -- but I still leave her for my wife Deborah. (Hi Deb!)"
The lines are now open.