In recent news, Chris Brown was caught acting like Chris Brown, again, and I’m not surprised.
As you know I rarely say anything bad about anybody, minus Chris Brown, my uncle, and that horrible ex-boyfriend I bring up every once in a while. I don’t really hold grudges against people either…well okay, there are a few, and one of them happens to be Chris Brown. Though I do not know him or Rihanna personally, I cannot stand him for what he did to her. I never saw a black eye that bad in my life, the fact that it was on the face of a petite girl only amplifies its intensity. Though it’s not my place to judge, after his appearance at the Grammy’s this week, I find myself wondering if someone like him deserves forgiveness or should be doomed to a life of social purgatory.
A friend once told me a story about a time that they were waiting for their flight in an airport terminal. Airport terminals aren’t loud but they can be fairly noisy. As he was waiting for the plane to board, the room suddenly became completely silent: you could hear the cliched pin drop. Why did everyone stop talking? He wondered, and then he got his answer when he saw OJ Simpson walk by.
There is no doubt in my mind that this is the way OJ was greeted every time he went out in public- until he was incarcerated, again. Does Chris Brown deserve this kind of treatment? Again, it’s not for me to say, but I know if I came face to face with him, I certainly wouldn’t give him the time of day. I think the only way to judge a situation like his is to think about his character and if it has improved since he got caught beating Rihanna. I say got caught because it is pretty hard to believe, with the severity of her injuries, that this was the first time in his life that he slipped and lost control of his fists.
Since then, there was the time he appeared on Good Morning America last March and flew into a rage after an interview where Robin Roberts asked him about the infamous night. He stormed off to his dressing room where authorities later discovered a chair had been used to smash one of the room’s windows. Most recently, on Grammy night, he left a Tweet boasting about his Grammy win, “HATE ALL YOU WANT BECAUSE I GOT A GRAMMY NOW. That’s the ultimate Fuck Off!”
Why the rage? Clearly this man lacks maturity and needs more anger management classes. After speaking to many domestic violence experts I have learned that a very small percentage of abusers, like Brown, change. And by small I mean less than 1%. Few of these men have the capacity to transform or the desire to change into peaceful members of society.
I know someone who has been to his parties and has hung out with Brown on more than one occasion. She says he’s a cool guy and a generous host. I am not sure if she is saying this as a way of exonerating him (or herself for hanging out with him)- regardless all I have to say is- of course he is kind and wonderful! Abusers have to suck their future victims in somehow- and it certainly won’t work if they punch you in the face right off the bat, now would it? Exactly, case closed. It’s just a matter of time before he blows up again.

I don't care what anybody says. He looks menacing, to me.
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Comments
This guy will never ever change.
Scum is as Scum does.
HUGGGGGGGGGG
CONGRATS ON THE EP
My close friend was hit only once by her now ex-husband. We all warned her of the odds, but she felt she knew best. He never touched her again in all the remaining years of their marriage. Not so much as a raised hand. He was so contrite, he never even raised his voice to her again. In case you're wondering, we were very close and I would have known if he had. Sure this kind of one-off may be rare, but it's at least possible.
I remember being appalled hearing of the Brown/ GMA incident. Doesn't he have handlers warning him against this kind of behavior I thought. But then again, perhaps he's truly troubled and trying hard to be a better man. We just can't really know for sure unless we learn of another attack? As far as his slightly hostile, juvenile tweet; stupidity is not a crime. I'll bet if you look into his background you'll find some bad parenting somewhere.
I can understand why so few of these people change, why should they, they're still getting all the goodies. When there is social and financial incentive for people to change, then they'll make the effort. Until then, I'm free not to support them financially and I don't have to treat them with respect they haven't earned. Having a Grammy doesn't make him any less of a useless hole.
Cranky Cuss- you sure did a good job of articulating exactly what I was thinking but could not put into words. I think you're right on the money!
Oryoki- "Amazingly, when a guy gets angry and you and lashes out and hits you, and you get mad, he gets mad at you for getting mad. " Ha- have I run into this one! It sounds like you dated a "thug" indeed- I really like your word choice for describing this type of male
"I can understand why so few of these people change, why should they, they're still getting all the goodies. " Bingo. Sad
After the awards, I hit up a few places where it was being discussed and spent some time reiterating my horror at his apparently being forgiven. Then I received a link to a list of tweets from various female Chris Brown fans on the night. My despair just grew deeper as I read tweet after tweet asking, even begging, for Chris Brown to appear on their doorstep like a knight in shining armor, and pummel their faces like he did to Rihanna:
http://storify.com/thisisjorge/women-on-twitter-saying-chris-brown-can-beat-them
After reading all that, I stopped caring about Chris Brown.
I remembered that our society has developed in such a way that sociopaths are significantly more likely to achieve fame and monetary success than regular folks like me & you.
And we live in a society that will reward a woman with fame and wealth simply for being Chris Brown's next victim. If she's smart, she could set herself up for life - if not from the payment to keep quiet, then from the exclusive rights to her story & photos of the damage.
I'm not making *any* sweeping generalisations about all women. I'm definitely not excusing Chris, or blaming Rihanna, or accusing her of getting beat up on purpose.
But I'm not going to try and pretend this is new, or Chris Brown's case is an aberration. Joe DiMaggio used to beat Marilyn Monroe at least as bad as Rihanna got hit by Chris. There's a near-infinite list of similar examples going back as far as historians have thought that a woman being beaten was worth reporting.
John Lennon freely admitted in later years that he used his fists on every woman he had ever loved, until he met Yoko. But at least he really was sorry.
I don't know if I have a point, but that list of tweets from the Grammy night really fucked up my entire conception of Chris Brown vs Everyone. My opinion of him hasn't changed one iota, but it's difficult to get angry about him when so many women apparently disagree with me.
He was a teenager when it happened.
Now he is serving lifetime purgatory.
I'm glad he won a Grammy.
He pled guilty to a felony. Did six months of community service. Attended a year of counseling. And lost a woman he was in love with.
No problem with these consequences. But to continue to bring it up for the rest of the guy's life?
Seems to have made his peace with Rhianna.
Since he was 19 when this happened, and since he has apologized for this innumerable times, I don't get the continuing hatred toward him.
This idea that he falls into some immutable pattern of abuse that some women have experienced .... doesn't mean that it fits him.
I would say the comments reflect more on the people making them than on Brown.
And, yea. He needs better handlers. And someone to monitor his twitter. To a lot of people, he is going to be a permanent symbol of their experience with an abusive guy. He does need to understand that and then move on.
"Troubled R&B singer Chris Brown had a major meltdown at the "Good Morning America" studios Tuesday, smashing a window and storming out shirtless after being asked about former gal-pal Rihanna.
"He looked like he wanted to kill somebody," said a "GMA" insider. "He went completely nuts. He just walked off the set, ripped off his shirt and went into the room and threw a chair and broke the window."
"It was incredible. He didn't say a word. Not a word. He just went berserk," the source added. "
He doesn't like a guy who has begun to grasp the consequences of what he did.
Sure what Chris Brown did was horribly wrong, but do you really have to bring up OJ? Nothing against you or your well-written article or your judgment calls or your opinion. Violence against women is pervasive and despicable, but this article only perpetuates the myth that black men are monsters and demons and should never be forgiven.
Cuss ....
Seems more like an anger management issue than the profile of a classic abuser (whatever that is).
Everyone is entitled to their own opinions on this.
At 22, he is still a young guy and I would be happy if he can move forward with his life.