I really do understand that these horrors boys are minors and not responsible for their own actions. That does not stop me from wishing they had been strangled in their cribs.

Evidently, the whole family… Read full post »

 Anthony and Bubble

From the time I was old enough to realize I wanted to be a mother,  I've wanted sons. By the time I was 27, I had them; three of them. (Even then, in my beautiful 20s, I was so insecure I thought, "What the hell do I want with a… Read full post »

Sometimes, in September, when the royalty checks are being printed somewhere back east, and the smell of much-needed money is in my nostrils, I visit my page on Amazon.com, to look at the rankings that tell me whether my books are still selling. In this way I fill myself with hope… Read full post »

Went out to buy shelves on Saturday with the MD of C, and came home with two bags of pig feed and an engagement ring. Cause that's how we roll!

I'm excited, happy, joyous, and free, and very much in love. The next thirty or forty years might not be… Read full post »

No, these cuties are not Peter Pan's Lost Boys. The green-haired sprite is Louis, and the one with the blonde spots holding his hand is my 8 year-old grandson, Damien. The venue is Las Vegas's First Friday event, the site is the sidewalk outside the Funkhouse, and the seating… Read full post »

Plenty has happened and I will tell you some:

I fell in love.

Remember the Miles Davis of cunnilingus? I moved in with him.

This has cut into my blogging time.

But I just approved the back cover copy for one of my soon-to-be-published books for Central… Read full post »

 OK, what's worse?

A. Your husband is "Client #9.
B. Your husband has "a wide stance."
C. Your husband diddled a chunky intern with thong panties and a Ronald-McDonald-size beret  in the Oval Office .
D. Your husband admitted he's secretly gay at… Read full post »

Let's see, they're Christians, right? How about they are giving all they have to the poor and disappearing to live lives of fasting and meditation, thereby never darkening our flatscreens or tabloids again? Oh, I guess they're not that kind of Christian.

How about a murder-suicide pact, havin… Read full post »

My hands are full.

I need to put something down.

In the too-short evening, in order to love you,

I need to let go of myself.

I will empty my hands of myself,

In order to carry your love.

Leaving myself to… Read full post »

Into  me and out. 

We lick, lie, love, love, lather,

rinse, repeat. repeat. Read full post »

So it seems that everybody's internet sweetheart, the homely yet talented Susan Boyle, is in a little trouble for dropping the F bomb in public.

The sweet spinster from the Scottish village of Brigakilbannon who claims never to have been kissed may have a few "wee swearies" up… Read full post »

There once was a fella named Kim.

Who took me to bed on a whim.

He paid a steep price,

But he did it so nice,

It made me glad I’m not a him. Read full post »

Red Roses

For me.

Best of all, they were delivered to the OFFICE! Read full post »

I don't shave it. I don't wax it. It's 56 years old.

Three LARGE babies used it to get into this world.

Some of the hairs there are grey.

He looked at it on Sunday night like he'd wandered into the little room in the British Museum where… Read full post »

. . . if you've ever used a binder clip to tie up your hair.

A young woman whose passion was blogging.

Found too much of her time it was hogging.

Dirty haikus, (and worse),

Much more juvenile verse,

Like this here, keep Duaneart's glasses fogging. Read full post »

 I've got a button.

It reads, "Flirty, Dirty,  and

Nerdy." Yup, that's me.

Read full post »

I am a real redhead, and should probably never have moved to the Mohave Desert, but there, it's done.

My dermatologist has frozen many keratoses and quick-before-they-metamorphose nevi off my nose, arms, neck and shoulders in the last few years; it hurts like fuck for a few minutes, but it's… Read full post »

  You might hate me if:

• Family reunions that end up with group picture sessions like this disturb you for some indefinable reason.

•  You are working in a call center in New Delhi, and I answer the phone when you call to ask when I intend to pay my/
… Read full post »

Not lather so much

as slickness, sleek as a seal,

making me come clean.

  Read full post »

They called  him “Padre Oprah” for his insightful advice about relationships. Born in Puerto Rico to Cuban parents, Father Alberto Cutie (Coo-tee-ay) grew up in Miami, where he developed an international following of millions with his television show, “Padre Alberto,&… Read full post »