hyblaean- Julie

hyblaean- Julie
Location
Chicagoish, Illinois, USA
Birthday
September 30
Bio
40; army brat; bisexual... still living with my ex partner (uhm, it's complicated?); perpetually confused, which makes me look like i'm doing a ditzy act, but actually it's not put on; middle class in cash if not culture (freaking finally); INFP/INFJ; SSRI, lithium, nicotine lozenge and caffeine dependent. Driven to laziness, odd fits of needing to 'fix' things, subthreshold hypomanic moments of productiveness (rarely) and random weirdness (often). --------------------------- If you have regular suicidal thoughts, please try lithium. It's worth a shot and has worked wonders for me.

MY RECENT POSTS

DECEMBER 18, 2008 9:24PM

Ok, these are probably ancient, but they made me giggle

Rate: 15 Flag

  A male patient is lying in bed in the hospital, wearing an
  Oxygen mask over his mouth and nose. A young, student nurse appears to
  Give him a  partial sponge bath.
                 
'Nurse', he mumbles, from behind the mask.
'Are my testicles black?'     
 
Embarrassed, the young nurse replies,
'I don't know, Sir. I'm only here to wash your upper body and feet.'     
 
He struggles to ask again, 'Nurse, please check. Are my testicles black?'
                 
 
Concerned that he may elevate his blood pressure and heart rate from worry about his  testicles, she overcomes her embarrassment and pulls back the covers.  
 
She raises his gown, holds his manhood in one hand and his testicles in the other.      
Then, she takes a close look and says,
'There's nothing wrong with them, Sir!'     
 
The man pulls off his oxygen mask, smiles at her and says very slowly,    
'Thank you very much. That was wonderful, but, listen very very closely...      
 
          ...Are---my---test---results---back?'




If you sometimes feel a little useless, offended or depressed....Always remember that YOU were once the fastest and most victorious little sperm out of millions

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Comments

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Gee, this is a laugh in a day of too much madness. I like the last line'Remember you were once the fastest sperm...
rated and laughed at.
I about peed laughing so hard, thanks!

Pawed and BUMPED!
Hyblaean,
It took me four tries to get your name spelled right I was laughing so hard! So we are all the Michael Phelps of the Guppy world? Is that right?
Exactly Mike! :D
I am king sperm *makes an arm muscle*
Oh that's a good one! Thanks for the chuckle. I keep avoiding responsible behavior tonight (OS addiction, anyone?) by jumping on here and a laugh was just what I needed.
:D glad you liked Lisa- yeah, complete addiction here too. I missed one or 2 days though, and just look at all the funny, sincere, loving posts that happened while I was gone. OS is pretty amazing.
Great fun! Ican't imagine being a 20 year old first-time nurse though. From what I hear, it's hard to deal with some of the men who really do want you to check out their testicles.
Thanks Rocky and Mildred!!
Sometimes yeah, the men in hospitals- whew- glad I'm not young, or pretty enough to have either the patients or the doctors making passes.
Hehehehehehe. You are funny... :)
Mama, those were both from my mom- when she's hot, she's hot. When she's not, I get alot of posts about cats...cats,god and angels...I'm sure that there is some reasoning to it, but I haven't figured it out yet.
:) Glad ya liked!
Never had heard this one H!!!!

HEHEHEHEHEHE I think everyone has heard a joke or a story like the play on words and misinterpretation of language.

Thumbed!
G
Laughed out loud.
Thanks!
Thanks GT, Cat and MB!! :D
Testicle humor is good humor.
Beth, got to get those furry bits in there ;)
Thanks John!
Thank you. My sister-in-law is a nurse full of hospital humor, but she's never told this one. Can't wait to drop it on her.